In Genesis 39, we read the story of how Joseph was brought as a slave to Egypt. There, he was sold to Potiphar "an officer of Pharaoh himself and captain of the guard, himself an Egyptian..." [v1 All quotes from The Voice Bible unless otherwise noted. The Voice Bible prints words that are not in the original text in italics/]
God favors Joseph in his new role and causes the household of Potiphar to prosper remarkably. So much so, that Potiphar puts Joseph in charge of his entire household!
Now Joseph was a well-built, good-looking young man. After a while, his master's wife began watching him, and she tried to seduce him.
[She said:] "Come. Sleep with me."
But Joseph refused.
When she kept pursuing and pressuring him, David responded very directly:
Look, please don't take offense, but with me in charge, my master has no concern for anything that goes on in his house. He has trusted me with everything he has. He hasn't treated me like I am anything less than he is, and he hasn't kept anything from me - except, of course, for you because you are his wife. Why would I do something so clearly wrong and sin so blatantly against God?
Although she pursued him day after day, Joseph would not consent to sleep with her and refused to be alone with her.
One day, however, when he went into the house to do his work while no one else was in the house, she grabbed him by his clothes and tried again to seduce him.
[vs.8-12]
____________________________________
THE DILEMMA
- Joseph is a slave who has gained the trust of his master.
- Joseph is a handsome man.
- He is also a godly man who recognizes that he has received God's favor.
- Potiphar's wife desires to have a sexual relationship with Joseph.
- He rebukes her invitations and attempts to help her to understand that he can't break his trust with Potiphar and he refuses to sin against God!
- She sets a trap for him and then accuses him of attempting to rape her when he avoids her trap!
- Potiphar believes the report of his wife and places Joseph into jail.
While serving as the lead associate pastor at a fast-growing, highly effective church, my ministry was largely focused on men. We were running three packed-out services every Sunday morning. There were a lot of beautiful women who attended the church! I knew that the men were struggling with this reality because some of them began asking me how to handle the sexual temptation and thoughts that were aroused in them - JUST BY ATTENDING CHURCH!I came up with an idea and began suggesting to the men that they sit in the front row of the church. By doing so, they would protect themselves against trying to peer at beautiful women while they were in worship. A few of the men gently persuaded their wives to join them in the front row. Then, the word caught on! More and more men began escorting their wives to sit at the front of the church! Before long, the first three or four rows were packed - from side-to-side - with these men and their wives!That's when the lead pastor - who happened to be a woman - walked into my office and asked what was going on! 😂
IS THERE ANY HELP?
Many men struggle with the desire to remain faithful to God but are subjected to billboards, television, attractive women they encounter or see during their day, and the fact that they likely carry a porn shop in their pocket!
For many Christian men, it is simply an exhausting enterprise.
Unfortunately, their churches offer little or no help with this struggle! The subject of sex is rarely addressed and when it is, the subject is often handled poorly with little practical advice.
Like so many other addictions, accountability is what is needed. Men need to be part of a band of brothers with common goals and an opportunity to talk openly and confidentially. They need to be able to identify with other men who are also struggling to maintain sexual integrity. They need an environment that is forgiving, encouraging, persistent, faithful and tough!
They need to be able to say, "I blew it this week and binged." They need a group who will help them dissect the experience and figure out what the triggers were that caused the lapse. They need to be helped to grow from the experience and put protocol in place to prevent it from happening again! They need a core group who will hold their feet to the fire and contact them between meetings with prayers, advice, check-ins, and even shared lunches to keep one another on track!
Imagine what a great resource a group of men like this could be to a youth pastor who is trying to train youthful boys to walk in integrity in their sexual lives?
Imagine the marriages that could be strengthened and preserved by a ministry that offered this kind of support to men who are struggling to be faithful - like Joseph - in the 21st century.
Imagine the support that could be available to men who have just lost their wives and are adjusting to life as a widower.
Older men should not be excluded from these support systems. The difference between sexual drives of men and women are significant. Older men still deal with the same temptations and often feel frustrated and guilty because of these unwanted desires.
___________________________________
WHAT ABOUT WOMEN?
I'll leave the addressing of the female needs, responses and temptations to another writer.
As a long-term pastor, I can say that there needs to be dialogue between women of all ages on the topic of sex and sexual sin. Younger women need guidance and courageous female leaders who will speak out and give them suggestions for how to navigate the complexities of sex in our age.
_____________________________________
God made us as sexual beings! He set limits on the use of this wonderful part of our male/female relationship! He honors those who revere those guidelines! God deals graciously with those who violate His purposes - but return through repentance! God certainly intended this part of our marriage relationship to be fulfilling, enjoyable and an expression of our love for one another throughout our married lives!
Thank you Pastor Haire for tackling such a sensitive topic and often avoided.Blessings to you.
ReplyDelete