CATALYST FOR GROWTH

My nephew, Scott, drove in from New York Friday to attend a meeting in our area on Saturday.  He brought his dad along so we could visit while he attended his meeting. Our son, Troy came over Saturday morning to spend some time with his Uncle Dick as well. It was a casual time of sitting in the cool of our front yard while visiting and swapping stories! 

I’d like to share some of Dick’s spiritual journey with you today.

Dick is Italian through and through! I met him when he started dating my sister, Beverly, back in the late 1960’s. I liked him immediately because he had the coolest Ford Mustang [I would have been about fourteen]!

Dick was a colorful addition to our family! He used language that wasn’t typically used in our family. He was outgoing and loved to laugh! Our family stretched to include him and enfolded his young son, Scotty, as well! Our parents – Leonard and Hazel Haire – enfolded Dick fully! He came to love and appreciate them until their deaths [Hazel – 1981; Leonard, 1992]. Their godly influence and full acceptance helped Dick’s transformation!

Few people know it, but Beverly and her best friend, Nancy, met two Italian guys at a skating rink. Dick and Dom were a bit older than they were, but they each became couples that stayed together through the years!  Dick was an AMAZING roller-skater! I’m told that when he went out on the floor, the skaters would clear the floor as he would show off his remarkable skills! 

On December 2, 1967, Bev and Dick were married in our home in New Brighton, PA. They got almost 58 years in before Beverly died in June, 2025. 

They lived life to the fullest! Their month-long vacations every March/April to resorts in Florida were famous for family get-togethers, relaxing by the pool, eating out and fun! One year, they took our son, Travis, with them and treated him to a trip to Disney [something that we were simply not able to afford].

Dick is a giver! He picks up the bill when a crowd goes out to eat! They put in a backyard swimming pool and Debbie and I camped in their backyard for our vacation for several years. Our kids absolutely loved Aunt Bev and Uncle Dick. For sixteen years, Dick worked at Tobin Meats. When we went to his house, we ate steak [something that was uncommon in the Haire house].

But I primarily want to talk about Dick’s spiritual pilgrimage. Meeting, dating and marrying Beverly changed Dick’s world forever!  Beverly put her faith first! To honor her, Dick would often attend worship with her at the campus Free Methodist Church in North Chili, NY. At that time, it had a congregation of nearly a thousand! He made lots of friends there. Over the years, Beverly attended several other churches. Dick didn’t always go, but he did always honor her faith!

In the course of time, Dick became friends with a professor from Roberts Wesleyan College. He was one of my Bible/Greek professors – Stanley Magill. Dick frequently ran into Prof Magill at a Greek restaurant down the street from the campus.  Dick smoked cigars at the time and Prof loved the smell of his cigars 😲 They forged a friendship that was influential in Dick’s spiritual pilgrimage!

Many of their friends came from Beverly’s Christian associations.  All along the way, Dick’s world became immersed in a faith community!  Then, God intervened and sent an Italian pastor to the Pearce Memorial Church. His name was Dr. V. J. Mannoia. He immediately connected with Dick and they spoke a language that bonded them as friends. It was during this period that Dick began to lead the prayer before our meals in his home. He often teared-up as he prayed! You could tell that it was meaningful for him to talk with God publicly! 

HOWEVER, new believers are not transformed overnight!  His language stayed colorful! Even yesterday, I giggled inside as we talked in the front yard!  I’m sure that Troy did too! I think we place too high expectations on new believers! Transformation is not an overnight experience!!!!!  It takes time!  Lots of time! 

Dick is an emotional man!  He spoke through tears repeatedly Friday evening and Saturday! Of course, he is adjusting to life alone – now that Beverly has moved on to Heaven.

Dick will readily admit that he based his hope for Heaven on having Beverly as his wife! He consdered her to be his ‘ticket to Heaven’!  He lovingly cared for her through three years of increasing dementia and constant home care! He exhausted himself watching over her and protecting her! And she wasn’t always nice to him during this debilitating period! But Dick’s love persisted! He assured her that he would keep her at home as long as he possibly could. Here’s how he put it: “This is what I signed up for!”

When she died, Dick was lost! Their big house was empty! Everywhere he looked – he saw memories of her! He wept! He still weeps – a year later!  Our family enfolded Dick and their daughter, Heather, and their son, Scott. We assured him that he would ALWAYS be part of the Haire family!

Through this floundering season, Dick began sitting at their kitchen table every morning and started reading the Bible with a cup of coffee and a light breakfast.  He tells me that he still reads it every morning! He says:

“Harold, I don’t always know what I’m reading, but I just keep reading. Then, I pray! I tell God that I’m not sure what it meant, but I’m not giving up! I tell Him how much I miss Bev. I pray for my kids. I pray for our president [whose picture is pasted on the garage door in front of him]. And I thank Him for all He's done for me!”

This is how Dick starts every day now!  He’s taking responsibility for his own faith! Beverly’s departure has catalyzed him into owning his faith in a personal way! IT’S A GOOD THING!  He’s forming his own relationship with God – perhaps for the first time! 

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What a gracious and wonderful God we serve! How He has coordinated Dick’s life is AWESOME!

·        First He brought Beverly into Dick’s life!

·        Then the Haire family – especially Leonard and Hazel.

·        His friend Dom became a fervent man of faith – along with his wife, Nancy [Beverly’s best friend]!

·        Then, along came the spiritual fireball – Stanley Magill!

·        Then, God brought V. J. Mannoia to Pearce Church to solidify the deal!

·        Dick and Bev’s son, Scott Iachetta, is a vibrant man of faith who has played a leading role in his youth work over the years – as well as his church!  Scott and Robin’s godly influence has certainly strengthened Dick – especially now that Dick is alone!

And only God knows all the other details, connections, provisions and catalysts that God has maneuvered into Dick’s life to keep him on-track and grow him into the man he is today!

I praise the Lord for His goodness! 

Do you see yourself in Dick’s story? 

God doesn’t love Dick any more than He loves YOU!  God intervenes in your life in just as creative ways as He did for Dick! Stop and think about it! God brings people and situations into our lives to satisfy His purposes!  He wants us to grow! He wants us to fulfill His mission for our lives! He calls us continually to higher ground!

You haven’t shut Him out – have you?

Open yourself anew to God’s voice and His ways! You might be surprised to know that He’s closer than you think!

YOU CAN'T GET TO HEAVEN ON SOMEONE ELSE'S APRON-STRINGS

My brother-in-law, Dick, is now a widower [since June of this year]. He and my sister, Beverly, were married over 57 years! He fit into our family wonderfully - fully accepted. Bev got him to attend church with her and he saw her dedication to God on a daily basis through all of those years. 

Dick is Italian! Early on in their relationship, God arranged for the Pearce Memorial Free Methodist Church to have an Italian pastor - Dr. V. J. Mannoia. Dick loved this pastor and they had many jokes that they shared. This moved Dick even closer to his own experience of God in his life. It was probably around that time that Dick would occasionally lead our family in prayer. He would weep as he prayed and his voice would get very high with emotion!

But, his life still had all of the color that it had exhibited before. My parents loved Dick and he loved them! We became a family to Dick and enfolded him completely! He especially loved my mom - in spite of the fact that she insisted on overcooking meat [a travesty to Dick who was a meat-cutter for seventeen years]. 😂

Over the years, Dick ran hot and cold as far as attending church was concerned. His son, Scott, has been a Christian leader since his teens when he began working with youth! Scott is still a committed layman who has the passion of a pastor! His investment in Christian ministry is exceptional! He's also been a massive Christian influence on his dad!

But Dick's faith always seemed to be dependent on Beverly. She was the spiritual leader of their home! His connection to God was tied directly to hers.

UNTIL JUNE!

After caring lovingly for Bev for over three years while her condition with dementia deteriorated gradually but distinctly, Dick was alone!

Like so many others who have faced this reality, he struggles. He weeps a lot! He banters around the house doing his chores and passing time. When I call, he cries. He maintains that he's getting along okay. He repeatedly says that he's making it "one day at a time". 

Debbie and I have been purposeful about going up twice since the memorial service. He seems to enjoy our visits and talks endlessly about his life. But this most recent visit was different.

He talked about the fact that his faith was anchored by Beverly. He recognized that he needed to have a personal relationship with God. So, he began sitting down at the breakfast table in their kitchen and reading his Bible. He tries to read a couple of chapters a day. 

He told us: "Harold, sometimes I don't even know what I read. I don't understand it at all."

[It's apparent to me that he began reading in Genesis which can be overwhelming for anyone.]

But, he has stuck with it! He says that when he finishes reading for the day, he sits there and talks to God. He tells God that he doesn't understand much of what he read. But, he observes that the people he read about seem to have a lot of problems! So, Dick turns his lonliness and other problems over to God on a daily basis! 

I interrupted him at this point by observing that a door to his garage - visible from his table - has a picture of Donald Trump on it. He laughed and said, "Yeah, Harold, I look at the picture and ask the Lord to help him with whatever he's doing today." We laughed together. But, isn't it remarkable that our president is being blessed every day by an 89-year-old, widower in Rochester, New York? It doesn't get any better than that!

Dick is managing! He is making the best of a heartbreaking situation! In spite of his loneliness, he is growing in his relationship with the Lord! He's praying for wisdom and direction about his home and his finances. He recognizes that he's blessed to have great neighbors who - for years - have helped him with his lawn, snow-removal, and leaf-gathering! They are good to Dick and genuinely care for him! He's thankful for lifelong friends who call him regularly to check up on him! He looks back on a life that was filled with abundance and plentiful pleasures! He has two precious kids in Scott and Heather, along with grandchildren and great-grandchildren who love and cherish him! He has no regrets!

Bev's death was tragic, but also a relief. He misses her dearly - as do many of us [she was my last sibling to go to Heaven]!  But, to an extent, Dick exhausted himself caring for her 24/7. He's finally getting a chance to rest up and relax. He's even making plans for his future! He still has dreams and desires that he'd like to act on. 

I share his story with you today as an encouragement! You can't get to Heaven because your parents were Christians! You can't get there because you go to church or are a member. You can't get there because you have been generous and treated people well all of your life. You won't arrive in Heaven because you lived a good life!

No! Sorry! These things don't really qualify you for entrance into Heaven - even though the world will tell you that they do...

You will be accepted into Heaven because you've developed a personal relationship with God through Jesus and the Holy Spirit! This relationship will gradually but certainly transform you into a person who genuinely and supremely loves God. God will use you to influence other people who know and relate to you! Your example may be the cause of family, neighbors, friends [even people in line with you at Walmart] to seek a deeper, more meaningful relationship with God as well! 

YOU MAY VERY WELL BE THE INSTRUMENT THAT GOD USES TO GET SOMEONE IN YOUR SPHERE OF INFLUENC INTO HEAVEN AS WELL!