THE FINGERPRINTS ON MY LIFE!

I just finished writing a letter to a man who intersected with our family while we were living in Spencerville, Maryland.  He has had a rough couple of years with his health and may be celebrating one of his last birthdays.  The letter was easy to write because of his generosity and expressions of creativity to us during that brief and challenging stint of our lives.

Writing his letter gave me cause to think about the many people who have engaged meaningfully with me (us) over the course of our lives.  Relationships are so much more valuable than possessions - there really is no comparison!  

As I grow older, I can't help but notice that my expressions of gratitude seem to continually expand and grow.  Perhaps it's perspective?  At this stage of life, its no longer hubris that catalyzes my life.  From my limited perspective, hubris evolves to humility!  I am humbled by the grace of God in the ways He has protected and provided for me and my family!  I can never praise Him enough!

I vividly recall the many years of high motivation and goal-setting.  I felt that I was invincible!  I had education, potential, giftedness, good background, excellent education and so much more!  Look out, world - here he comes!  🙄  I must have been intolerable at times!  These are the signs of youth and young adulthood as we stretch into our new wings and learn to fly!  

But there are SO MANY fingerprints on my life!

• Parents - It would take a book to analyze and describe their dynamic, positive influence.
• Debbie and my kids - That smiley-faced girl that rocked my world when I was sixteen is still deeply forming and impacting my life!  She is my greatest earthly treasure and she has had an enormous impact on me in so many wonderful ways!  The pride I have in our kids and the joy I take from their pursuits and adventures is beyond description!  We deliberately raised them to be independent - even though we knew that doing so would limit our exposure to them.  But, WOW! have they flourished!  Travis gave us opportunities that we would never have dreamed of!  Troy's intermittent contacts with us bring delight and meet our needs so marvelously.  He is highly regarded by many [as is Missy], and is a godly man!  Tracie and Jon gave us two of the most wonderful gifts in Rylie and Coltin!  She amazes us with her efficiency, confidence and dedication to her family!  She models so many admirable qualities!  If you have anything negative to say about Jon, don't say it around me!  He's an amazing husband and father and I thank God for him daily!  
• Teachers - From Sunday School through two master's degrees!  Particularly those that took an interest in me and invested their time and attention.  I was 'in school' - in one form or another - until I turned thirty-nine and completed my M.A. Counseling, so there were a lot of them! 
• Parishoners - Those who accepted me and invested in me with wisdom and grace.  Certain members actually became mentors of grace, passion and patience.  There are so many that I should write about because their influence was significant!
• Friends - From the influence [positive and negative] of childhood and high school friends, the camaraderie of college friends, the friends and neighbors that graced our lives all along the way, and the family friendships that added so much value and meaning to our lives!  But, there were also men in every place we've lived who made themselves special in a panoply of ways:  

            >  guys that shared my passion for the faith and growth of the church!
            >  backpacking buddies.
            >  in earlier years, young men that shared my love for sports.
            >  men that I was privileged to lead to faith in Christ and guide in their early walk with  Christ!
            >  fellows that became my helpers with my cars, other projects, or who were work  associates in the many extracurricular activities that I invested in.

I've always pointed out to Debbie that some of the best stories are about men who connect deeply, share without limits and experience the joys of life together!  I've been blessed to have many in that category!  

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Are you getting the message?  

I've long described myself as the 'prosperous man' that is talked about so frequently throughout the scriptures!  

So, on this eve of the eve of Thanksgiving, Lord, I publicly thank You for Your continual kindness and favor to me!  I marvel at Your generosity and provision!  I am grateful for family, friends and fellowship all along the journey of my life!  

Continue to guide and instruct me through these latter years of development.  Help me to keep learning and growing that I might be ready and able to contribute to the lives of others who You might cause me to intersect with!  

You are an awesome God and it is my privilege to serve You!  

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Maybe you'd like to make a list of the people who have impacted you throughout the years?  It's a good way to frame your 2024 celebration of Thanksgiving!

I'M A PROSPEROUS MAN!

I had a lesson that I used when I was teaching in Changchun (PRC).  It was on stereotypes.  I asked my students to start naming characteristics of Americans.  They quickly started responding:

• tall
• humorous
• outgoing
• friendly
• good-looking
• rich
• intelligent
• creative

Then, I asked them where these ideas came from.  It was a humorous moment because I watched some of them look at the list and then look at me - as the lights came on!  They had formed an opinion about Americans based on their knowledge of me and Mrs. Osborne, their freshman 'Oral English' teacher!  Now, no matter how hard I tried to convince them that I was NOT rich, they persisted in believing that I was.  Ha ha ha ha...

Today, however, I suddenly realized that I am, indeed, rich!  I placed a post on Facebook last evening and was surprised when I checked in moments ago at how many people had 'Liked' my post.  I opened the list and read down through the names.  It included people from:

• my high school class
• New Brighton FMC (my home church)
• Oakland Church
• Tri-State Family Camp
• Cornerstone Church
• Freedom Church
• the Ohio Conference (FMC)
• China
• Kittanning Free Methodist Church
• the Pittsburgh Conference (FMC)
• the Whippo family
• the Haire family
• our current neighborhood
• New Springfield Church of God
• and some others who are hard to put in a general category!

Mark Twain said, "No man is a failure who has friends."  [also quoted in IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE].  

No one (except, perhaps, my Chinese students) thinks of me as a wealthy man!  However, I have always thought of myself as a suitable representative of the prosperous man that the Bible talks so much about.  I have a near-daily ritual I go through and I frequently include Debbie in it.  It goes like this:

Lord,

Thank You for my wife who loves me, encourages me and supports me in all my wild ventures!

Thank You for my children and my precious grandchildren!  I love them so!

And thank You for Leonard and Hazel Haire and the hairetage of faith they established for me!

And thank you for my siblings and the blessings they have been in my life!

And thank You for the extended family who have blessed and enriched my life beyond words!

Thank You, Lord for the many teachers who have made investments in my life over the years!  

And thank You for the mentors who modeled excellence and leadership for me!  

And thank You, Lord, for my work and the people You have caused me to intersect with over the years!

And thank You for my home and the fact that it's paid for!  Hallelujah!  (There was a time when I never thought this would be possible!)

And thank You for my cars (some will smile here).

And thank You for all the comforts that we enjoy!

And thank You for an adequate income;  

for a government that provides our Social Security;  

and for the Free Methodist Church and its wisdom in providing for my pension!

[You get the drift...]

Can you see why I consider myself a prosperous man?  Debbie and I are often surprised by the support of those around us who seem to love us and care about us.  When we went to China we were blessed to be financially and prayerfully supported by hundreds of friends and family!  When Travis died, we were overwhelmed by the supportive cards, gifts, and messages that we received.  When we faced various challenges along the way (financial, child-rearing, vocational, physical) we've always been surrounded by people who wanted to help, encourage or bless us!  

And to be quite frank:  I don't deserve any of this!  I'm a VERY average guy who was the fourth-born to a nail-maker and a home-maker.  I grew up in small-town, America, and got 28 C's in my high school career (I know this because it kept me from getting into a Master's degree program later in life).  My coolest cars were:  a '63 Chevy (when I was 16) and a brand new 1974 Mustang II  (when I was 22).  I've never made big wages and never taken extravagant vacations.  Our kids remember camping at Pymatuning as the highlight of our summer (and maybe going to the water-slides)!  I've rarely been the best at anything (although Debbie and I did get a trophy on our honeymoon for being the "Best In The Sack' [sack races - if you don't know what they are, ask a person over 50]).  

You get the drift...

And yet  -  I am surrounded by friends from so many places and environments!  This is clearly a vivid picture of GOD'S AMAZING GRACE!  And I am so thankful for the friends who populate my world!  If you're one of them - please know how much I appreciate the way you've impacted my life!

Thank You, Lord!  You're ALWAYS GOOD!!!!!!     

Boyhood Friends

We'd make our plans on the school bus while riding home at the end of the day.  Bob and I got off at the Honor Roll bus-stop between Brighton Heights and Crescent Heights.  We would agree to meet there after checking in with our moms and changing clothes - which usually took about fifteen minutes. John and Larry went a half-mile further to the Stuber road bus-stop.  We all convened at Larry's as soon as possible to take full advantage of whatever sunshine we had.

Larry's neighbor (a doctor) had an old, unused tennis court that became our football field.  It was usually Bob and me against John and Larry.  We had a variety of rules that we incorporated into our self-devised game of 'Razzle-Dazzle Drop Football'.

The game consisted primarily of passing;  however, if the pass was incomplete, the other team got the ball wherever it hit the ground.  It was a fast, back-and-forth game that kept things exciting.  We loved playing football and lamented when it was time to end the game and return to our homes. Bob and I would walk down Mercer Road talking all-the-way (occasionally getting distracted by climbing the huge sycamore trees along the way)!

Eventually, we'd switch over to basketball - often playing on the tiny court behind Bob's house on Crescent Heights.  Bob and I frequently continued playing well after dark with the help of a spotlight on the back of his house!

I grew up with these three guys.  There were occasionally others who joined us, but we four had a special friendship that bound us together.  Bob was best man in my wedding, and Larry was one of my groomsmen.

In the summer, we had sleep-outs.  Occasionally, we caroused the neighborhood in the dark, evading automatic lights and swiping a tomato from a neighbor's garden.  I remember one night when we walked out Mercer Road several miles - diving for cover if a car came either way.

Summers also gave us opportunity for bike-hikes.  Usually this meant going far out Stuber Road.  One time we followed an old dirt road and dropped down into Eastvale.  After we discovered this destination, it was just a matter of time before we continued down through Beaver Falls and crossed the 10th Street bridge to return to our homes!

I can remember twice when Bob and I rode our bikes to Darlington Lake.  I don't think our mothers knew we did this!  It was a great place to swim because it had a huge sliding board that dropped into the water!

The leisure season also gave us opportunities to explore the woods behind Brighton Heights.  We hiked up to the 'Indian Caves'.  We built forts and played army. We caught lizards and crabs in the creek.  We hiked down to the Beaver River and then walked the tracks back into town where we'd get a milkshake at Isaly's.

In the winter we would sled-ride on Valley Avenue and lob snowballs from Brighton Heights down on cars traveling up Mercer Road!

Those were fun and free days!

However, our lives changed a bit as we entered junior and senior high school. New friends were developed and our relationships gradually became a bit more distant.  We still occasionally had classes together.  Bob and Larry had engineering prospects;  I took every math class NB offered - just to be with them.  They pulled me through with barely passing grades!  Ha ha ha...   Larry ended up being the valedictorian of our class!  My claim to fame (and reason for being at the head of the procession) was due to singing a solo at our commencement:  "No Man Is An Island".

However, throughout most of those years we continued our friendship by sharing the New Brighton High School 'open-lunch-period' by hitting the Brighton Hot Dog Shop!  Those were the days when three hot dogs, a fry and a shake came to $.95 with $.05 tax;  so, for a buck we had an awesome lunch!  :-)

But life moves on...

I did have the opportunity of marrying Bob and his wife some years later.  I also stopped to visit Larry in his law office one time, but we didn't seem to have anything to talk about.  It's sad that these wonderful friends have not been a part of my adult life, when we shared so many fantastic times together as boys!

I don't know where they are today or what they're doing, but I hope their lives have gone well.  I hope they're happy and fulfilled! I valued their friendship and we shared dreams and fantasies together while having tons of fun!  If I could, I'd thank them for their friendship and the memories we made together!  I'd also pray God's blessings on their lives!