EXPERIENCING THE PRESENCE OF GOD – 5

Working with Brenda Young at Cornerstone Church in Akron, Ohio, was exhilarating and foundational.  I learned a lot through her teaching and modeling.  By 2003, it became clear that she was leading the church in new directions and was beginning to target a younger age group than we had previously focused on. 

Coordinated with that, Superintendent Charlie Young offered me the opportunity to lead a church in the conference.  I believe his words were something like: “You’ve been operating under the radar long enough; the conference needs you to step up and lead a church.”  I didn’t accept his first offer.  However, when he mentioned the New Middletown Free Methodist Church – Debbie accepted the offer!  [Her family farm and five of her seven siblings lived in proximity to this church.] 😆

Actually, I had made an attempt to move to New Middletown when we were leaving East Liverpool in 1995, but the superintendent – at that time – appointed his son instead.  Subsequently, we moved to Maryland. 

So, after much learning and amazing experiences, we quit our job with Shelter Care, packed up and moved to New Middletown, Ohio. 

Turns out, it was the hardest start at a new church that I had ever faced!  The church was deeply divided!  It’s a story of its own, but not a story for now.

Within six months, unity had been restored.  There had been some losses, but there had also been an equal number of gains. 

For the first several years, I tried not to change much, but to be dedicated to serving the people and discerning leadership potential.  Ultimately, the people began to respond and the congregation began to grow.  With the approval of the Ministry Council [think Leadership Board], we made a number of significant changes that would change the dynamics of the church considerably. 

Before long, we were averaging over 150.  We had developed two capable worship teams:  One Generation and Here’s Life!  Actually, we had a third team that played occasionally; we referred to them as the Gospel Team. 

Lay leaders were utilized heavily in the leadership of worship!  I had several that I used for preaching from time-to-time.  Our staff – of about ten leaders – met every Tuesday morning for evaluation and planning.  They were a very dedicated group and hard working! 

We tried hard to avoid predictability in worship.  Without being extreme, we made subtle changes in the worship format from week-to-week.  The music we learned and used was primarily upbeat and joyful.  My only participation in the service was to bring the message.  Other leaders did everything else.  I began writing dramas/skits to illustrate the messages.  I would turn them over to my sister-in-law, Laurie Mahosky.  She would recruit participants and add her own embellishments.  These were often humorous and sometimes quite powerful!  They were always well-received! 

Before long, our pews were being filled every week and we were breaking the two-hundred-barrier!  It was exciting.  For over a year we experimented with two services.  We saw explosive growth among our target group of individuals and couples in their twenties and thirties.  We had to expand our nursery shortly after to accommodate all of the new babies that were part of the congregation! 

We were recognized by our denomination two years in a row as a ‘Multiplying Church’.  It was about this time that we were asked to participate in a national survey of churches.  It was awkward because we were asked to have our people fill out a form during worship that would take nearly ten minutes.

We decided to participate, and our people took the awkwardness in stride.  The responses were immediately placed in an envelope and sent in.  Weeks later we received the results and our leaders pored over them to see what we could learn from these vital responses. 

We were delighted – above all – to see that when asked:  “How often do you experience the presence of God in your church’s worship?”, our people resoundingly responded “Regularly!”

It was a vital affirmation that we were on the right track! 

The worship was vibrant!  Prayer was highly prioritized!  All age groups were fully represented.  There were no open conflicts among the body of believers.  New people were attending regularly; not all stayed, but many did!  Leaders were being continually recruited and trained.  The entire ministry was led by teams! 

I have many memories of sensing the moving of God’s Holy Spirit during our worship times!  And I am grateful for His leadership and for His blessing! 

EXPERIENCING THE PRESENCE OF GOD - 4

In February, 1997, the hand of God moved us to Akron, Ohio.  We had passed through deep waters as a family and had completely disrupted our lives for four months by essentially becoming homeless by choice.  I had left my appointment to the Spencerville, Maryland Free Methodist Church mid-year due to a family crisis.  After months of struggle, financial distress and utter dependence on God, we landed a job in Akron that provided a home and an income. 

We knew upon our arrival that we would attend the Akron Cornerstone Church, where seminary acquaintances of ours were the pastors: Charlie and Brenda Young. 

From the very first Sunday, Debbie and I, Troy and Tracie were wonderfully received.  Being in this new environment – where few knew me – catalyzed me to change my name from Harold to Hal.  😊  Within weeks, Brenda invited me to join the Cornerstone staff as a part-time associate.  Within a few months, she lost another pastor, and I became the Lead Associate Pastor of the church. 

This was the beginning of nearly six years of engagement that would challenge and grow me in ways I could never have imagined! 

Cornerstone had been led for years by Pastor Charlie [and Brenda].  It had become a healthy church that had built a new sanctuary and a strong, congregation of new believers.  Pastor Charlie had also planted another church during his tenure near Dalton, Ohio!  His passion was recognized and he was elected to be the Ohio Conference Superintendent.  Brenda became the new Lead Pastor at Cornerstone.

The already healthy and growing church nearly doubled in size in the next two years.  Brenda built aggressively on the foundation that she and Charlie had established through many years of persistent and excellent leadership! 

The Haire family arrived in the midst of this growth to see a vibrant church of four hundred with a busy schedule and a staff of part-time leaders. 

LET ME TRY TO DESCRIBE CORNERSTONE CHURCH AT THAT TIME

It was a vibrant church that was packing two services every Sunday morning.  Brenda referred to the congregation as having a mall make-up.  It was as though you went to the local mall and just randomly selected four hundred people and put them together in a church!  There was no common social definer. 

Brenda’s teaching/preaching style was a big key to the growth!  Her profoundly understandable manner of presenting the Word in practical terms simply drew people! 

The worship of the church was dynamic!  For one thing, having a worship center packed with people every Sunday does a lot to generate excitement!  The worship team was amazing!  The raw talent and fresh love for Jesus was evident in this group!  The mood of worship was praise and joy!  A prayer time was always observed when people would come forward and kneel around the altar four-and-five people deep!  It represented a passionate outcry to God and an utter expectation that He would draw near and help! 

[For a vivid picture of Cornerstone at that time, read my blog describing our family’s first visit to the church:  https://hal-lelujah.blogspot.com/2020/04/first-sunday.html]

THIS IS THE MOST AMAZING CHURCH THAT I HAVE EVER BEEN PRIVILEGED TO SERVE!

During my time of service with Brenda, we saw new converts every week!  The church’s outreach was largely based on several ‘feeders’:

1.       Brenda and I each did counseling.  Our intervention in failing marriages was significant! 

2.       The church operated Cornerstone Care, an in-house counseling center that was staffed by several counselors who were an integral part of our congregation.

3.       Jesus Said Ministry was a lay-led outreach to the homeless in downtown Akron every Saturday morning that provided – in an outdoor setting – hot food, free clothing, and vibrant, live worship!  The crowd often numbered around 150.  Many volunteers from various churches participated!

4.       The church offered a free meal every week in our fellowship hall to anyone who needed it!

5.       We operated a Sunday evening program called ‘Champion’s Institute’ that offered classes to help new believers grow in their new-found faith! 

6.       Cornerstone offered several crowd-gathering events each year on the property to gain an influence in people’s lives!

·         An annual outdoor music festival with food booths.

·         An Easter-Egg Hunt that drew hundreds of children and families!

·         A Trunk-n-Treat event over Halloween weekend that engaged the children creatively and generously!

·         A mid-summer cook-out that featured meat grilled by a couple of well-known Akron police officers! 

·         An outdoor Christmas Light-Up event that featured a famous Nativity set that had previously been featured on the roof of a downtown department store.

7.       Cornerstone offered an ongoing NA group, Divorce-Care group, prayer groups, Grief Share group, and a number of other specific opportunities for growth and self-improvement!

Forgive me for failing to mention so many other outreaches and programs that I simply am failing to recall! 

EXPERIENCING THE PRESENCE OF GOD!!!!!!

Experiencing God’s presence was the norm at this amazing church!  It’s the only church I know of where 75% of the congregants were first-time believers!  Expectations were high! 

First-time attenders frequently reported that they couldn’t stop crying during worship.  We explained to them that they were experiencing the presence of God!!!!! 

Things got rowdy!  😂

This congregation had NOT been steeped in the traditions of the church!  They didn’t know ‘how to behave during worship’.  😆   Baptisms were greeted with vigorous applause, hoots, clapping and cheers!  People danced in the aisles on occasions to the thrill of the upbeat praise music!  When the doors were opened to the worship center, people ran to get the best seats and save them for others! 

Eventually, the church grew to over seven hundred!  We acknowledged that no one knew everyone anymore – not even Brenda! 

God showed up every Sunday and at every special event!  His presence blessed, healed, renewed, challenged and rescued hundreds of souls! 

There’s so much more that could be said and I feel that I’ve failed to truly and effectively describe this remarkable movement of God.  I know that my family was honored to be a part of this ministry.  When we left Akron, our son, Troy, stayed and became part of the young adult leadership who were beginning to take the church in new directions.  This engagement helped to ground him during critical years of his development!

I haven’t attended Cornerstone Church for a long time!  It is currently under the leadership of Jacob Young – Charlie and Brenda’s youngest son.  Their daughter, Rachel, is also a worship leader and major contributor to the ministry.  I’m confident that the passion is still high and the influence is still great.  When my current responsibilities at The Foundery FMC in Wellsburg, WV end, I hope to visit Cornerstone to reconnect with old friends and make new ones! 

EXPERIENCING THE PRESENCE OF GOD – 3

The spiritual influences that formed me have been diverse.

I’ve already spoken of the impact of my ‘growing up’ church experience.

Immediately after Debbie and I were married, we took up residence in Wilmore, Kentucky where I attended Asbury Theological Seminary for three years.  It was a United Methodist school, so the diversity represented there – in professors and students – wasn’t extreme.

However, within two years of leaving Asbury, I continued my theological education at Pittsburgh Theological Seminary.  In this setting the theology department was focusing on multiple threads of training:  Liberation Theology, Feminist Theology [half my classmates were women], Calvinistic Theology, and Process Theology.  I struggled with the challenges I faced during this period, but I believe I came out stronger as a result of this exposure and tension.

While attending PTS, I also dabbled in some Roman Catholic experiences.  I was particularly impacted by a program called ‘Domus Dei’ [House of God].  It was an exhaustive engagement with a group of people who determined to experience God through introspection and meditation!  I made new friends and developed a greater intimacy with God through blended and shared expressions of solitude and silence.

Within a very short time, I began studying for a Master of Arts degree in Counseling at the Franciscan University of Steubenville [OH].  Franciscan is a charismatic Catholic University.  My classmates became my friends.  I attended full-time for two years to accomplish my goal [while being a full-time pastor of a growing church and a husband and dad]. During this two years, I attended the noon mass on campus with my classmates.  I picketed abortion clinics with my classmates.  Debbie and I became very close to one couple in particular.  Ed had a heavy impact on me during these years.

During the summer, Franciscan held massive tent meetings on campus.  People came from far and wide to attend these meetings.  I participated in these several times and was deeply influenced by the powerful manifestation of the Spirit in these meetings. 

One of the things that impressed me most was that when the meetings ended, I remained in my seat and just didn’t want to leave!  I was not alone!  Many remained in their seats.  The worship team continued to play and we continued to worship.  Sometimes these ‘post-worship’ seasons went on for another hour!  The presence of God was tangible!  There was weeping.  People went forward – alone or in groups – to pray.  The singing moderated between joyful awareness and humble submission.  The worship team was extremely sensitive to the mood of the people!  I was always one of the last to leave!  My most memorable and dynamic experiences of the presence of God took place in those tents and in that chapel!

From this time forward, I tried to train worship teams to replicate this type of experience.  The difference was in the realization that the worship team had two roles:

1.    To lead passionately and draw people into the presence of God.  This implied that the worship team members had to already BE IN THE PRESENCE OF GOD!

2.    To lead responsively – sensing and responding to the mood of the worshippers.  This required courage and a yielding to the Spirit in the moment!

I remember the first time that our people began to linger after the worship service ended.  While many left the sanctuary, others remained and moved closer to the worship team to be united with them in delivering our praise to God!  I was exuberant to see this occurring!  I felt that a barrier had been broken! 

I was indelibly impacted by these eclectic and divergent experiences.  I am thankful to God for guiding me and allowing me to experience His presence in environments that were not part of my ‘growing-up’ tradition!  It has enriched my life in innumerable ways! 

EXPERIENCING THE PRESENCE OF GOD - 2

At the age of thirty, I was appointed to lead the Oakland Free Methodist Church in East Liverpool, Ohio.  This church had a beautiful, relatively new building just off a main boulevard in the east end of town.  They owned nearly an entire block.  It included a pleasant foyer, lovely worship center, educational wing and a fellowship hall where you could feed one hundred people at a sit-down meal!  

Unfortunately, we arrived in East Liverpool simultaneous to the shutting down of the Crucible Steel Mill in nearby Midland, Pennsylvania.  As a result, sixteen hundred families had lost their main source of income!  

In addition, the community was significantly torn over opinions regarding the projected building of a Waste Technologies Industry facility within 1,500 feet of the church!  

These factors combined to make our arrival in East Liverpool a challenge!  Every church and business felt the stress of a community that was struggling for its very existence!  

But, remarkably, this was not the major cause of concern in the Oakland Church!  

The church had experienced a blessing of growth and new converts under the ministry of Harold Estel.  It was under his leadership that the new property was purchased and the new building erected.  

However, the growth of this period was devastated by several years of conflict and a mass departure of congregants, resulting in an older generation with a congregation of around seventy people.  

Upon my arrival, the leadership of the church was constituted by people from my parents' generation.  Some younger families and people remained, but they were not leaders or shapers of the future.  My leadership began in the summer of 1982.  

For a few years, I struggled to create changes.  Most of my ideas and suggestions were rejected.  

There is a general observation that a pastor will tend to reach those who are within a range of ten years younger or older.  This is, of course, not a hard-and-fast rule, but is a commonly accepted phenomenon.  Consequently, the growth we did see in those early years began to populate the church with couples and people closer to our age group.

One of the key teachers in the evangelical Christian community at this time was John Maxwell.  He was leading a seminar at this time called 'Breaking The 200 Barrier'.  I attended it alone.  Then, I attended it a second time and took two Oakland leaders with me.  Then, we went a third time with about eight leaders.  Finally, we went a fourth time with nearly a dozen leaders.

We began to see a wave of new converts.  As the worshiping congregation grew, there was some transfer growth [which is inevitable].  Within several years, we were a worshiping community of nearly one hundred fifty.  

However, the tension between generations continued.  Every gain came through opposition and conflict.  My role became one of being a moderator between the two groups: one that had led the church for decades and a newer, younger group with charismatic leanings that were eager to work, innovate and see Kingdom growth!  

The 1980's saw an explosion of new worship innovations as a result of the 'Praise & Worship Movement'.  Integrity Music, Hosanna and other creators contributed to this period.  The concept of leading worship with a team was beginning to become popular.  Oakland had enjoyed a rich tradition of music led by a song leader with an accompanist at the organ and piano.  We began experimenting with  new approaches in our Sunday evening worship.  It was well-received!  Gradually, we transitioned our morning worship as well.  The church continued to grow and we occasionally saw our attendance exceed two hundred!  It was a blessed time!  Too many stories to tell!  

Key lay leaders emerged who became significant influencers!  Gifted musicians partnered to create a free-flowing worship environment that energized our people and cultivated a deep love for God!  

The use of simple choruses and new musical forms catalyzed our worship experience.  All of this took place without abandoning the much-loved hymns of the church!  

As a result of the growth, the opposition became somewhat less intense - although it never ended!  The victories were gained by a simple, overwhelming growth - especially in the area of new converts!  

Many of my most noteworthy times of worship took place in the sanctuary of the Oakland Church!  I have purposely avoided mentioning names for fear of omitting someone who was key to this time of spiritual renewal!     

KEY FACTORS:

• MUSIC  -  Fresh, new, exhilarating music was a key factor in this renewal.  Capable, dedicated and willing musicians made it all possible!
• FAITH  -  The teaching propagated as a result of this renewal was faith-based!  Healings and expecting great things from God became a hallmark of this church's worship!  

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A Monday evening prayer group formed in a parishoner's home.  It's focus was worship and faith-based teaching.  It was characterized by healings and focused prayer!  This group had a dynamic impact on the church and the community!  It carried on its ministry for most of my thirteen years at the church!

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• TOLERANCE  -  We were bound together by our love for Christ!  There were many who held differences of opinion about theological matters and certain biblical perspectives.  However, these were not allowed to become divisive!  We maintained a passion for God and a desire to see His Kingdom grow!  

I am grateful to the many who contributed to this season of my life!  It was a corporate experience!  The fingerprints of so many allowed it to become a movement of God!  Most of my richest experiences of the presence of God came during those years!  I am forever grateful!  

EXPERIENCING THE PRESENCE OF GOD - 1

Some reading this blog may be able to identify with my childhood experiences - others will find these descriptions foreign or strange.

I grew up during the 1950's and 1960's in a very spiritually oriented home.  I was the youngest of four children who were spaced over fifteen years.  I never really knew my oldest sister and brother very well.  My parents were very devoted to the Lord and this took its form through faithfulness to their church.  

Our church was a large church by 1960 standards.  A layman [Joe Douglas] was devoted to visitation and outreach and almost single-handedly grew the Sunday School to a record-high 614 one Easter Sunday around 1968!  The church operated three old school buses and brought [mostly] children in from neighboring towns.  

Another layman [Morrison Baker] was a charming and talented man who led the song service consistently throughout my growing-up years.  [The 'song-service' was the time of worship preceeding the giving of the message by the 'preacher'.]  We always had a pianist and organist to accompany our singing and they were equally capable at their assignment.  Consequently, this congregation loved to sing as an expression of their worship!

Although we did not sing through the hymnal, at one time or another we sang nearly every hymn!  I recall these times of singing with great favor - even those of us who were part of the youth group sang enthusiastically.  We loved the occasional Sunday evening when 'Brother Baker' would open it up for us to call out favorites.  We automatically hollered out number 106, which was "Wonderful Grace of Jesus" [written by Haldor Lillenas].  Our church was blessed to have people capable of singing all four parts enthusiastically, so - to our ears - we sounded like a grand choir!  

Something happened frequently during those 'song services'.  It's difficult to describe, but at some point I would sense that there was something more going on than just singing a song together.  In my childhood and youthful zeal, this experience simply caused me to want to sing louder and more enthusiastically!  I had little language to express what I was experiencing, other than to say that the service was really blessed that night.

As a theologically trained pastor reflecting back, I can now observe that these were genuine experiences of the presence of God through His Holy Spirit!  These experiences were fairly frequent, very powerful and usually came in the midst of our act of worship!  

These were simple, ordinary people who sincerely loved God and were trying to live their lives to His glory!  They had excellent leadership that fostered a great passion to see the Kingdom of God grow and expand!  

I am deeply grateful for these experiences of God's presence!  I hold these memories as precious!  They elicited in me a desire to continue to be in environments where God would draw close and we could sense His nearness!  That desire became a drive in me as I grew into the role of being a pastor!  I desperately wanted the churches that I led to be places where people would frequently experience the presence of God!  

JACOB'S OTHER ELEVEN!

This is a follow-up to a previous blog titled: PARENTING – JACOB’S FAILURES WITH JOSEPH.  Reading this blog will have added meaning after reading the first article. 

To be one of twelve kids might have some challenges! 

My wife, Debbie, is the ‘first-born’ [her choice of words] of nine kids.  I’m confident that they would all admit to a certain amount of chaos, conflict and competition while growing up.  Yet, I have two observations I will make about them without hesitation:

First, they are VERY CLOSELY connected!  They have a family thread that is active and alive every day.  Intercommunication is a key to close relationships!  They clearly love and respect each other.  They vacation together, pray for one another, and socialize frequently.

Second, they have been a remarkable support system to Debbie and me throughout our many years of ministry!  They created a safe place for us where we could relax and be ourselves.  They’ve loved and supported us unconditionally through some pretty strenuous crises in our family and churches. 

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In our story from yesterday, Jacob clearly favored Joseph above his other eleven sons: Reuben, Simeon, Levi, Dan, Naphtali, Gad, Asher, Issachar, Zebulun, and Benjamin.  These boys were born to Leah, Rachel’s handmaid – Bilhah, Leah’s handmaid – Zilpah, and Rachel. 

Joseph was clearly the first-born of Jacob’s true love – Rachel.  This was apparently the reason that Jacob loved him so much!

But what must it have been like for the other eleven?  It had to have had an impact for one of the youngest to be so revered and honored.  How must Reuben have felt?  After all, he was the true ‘first-born son’ that was deemed so important in this period. 

The biblical record doesn’t hide the tension between these men.  That’s a lot of testosterone to be driving rivalries, positioning and differing opinions.  In Genesis 37 – the chapter under consideration – we notice that Reuben and Simeon are key players.  They happen to be the two oldest.  There clearly was a rank that was observed in this family in spite of the favoritism toward Joseph.  Reuben apparently felt the pressure of being held to account if anything should happen to his younger brother. 

First-born children often grow up with an increased sense of responsibility.  They are commonly viewed as mini-parents as they exercise authority over younger siblings. 

The study of birth order is a fascinating exploration that can shed vital light on the development of personalities within a family system!  [BOOK RECOMMENDATION:  The Birth Order Book: Why You Are the Way You Are, by Dr. Kevin Leman]

In 1986, John Trent and Gary Smalley presented a book titled, THE BLESSING.  [I just checked: this book – and its updated versions – is still available today!] 

The book studies the Old Testament concept of passing on a blessing to one’s children and then extrapolates from these observations to suggest five vital factors involved in giving the blessing to your children.  They are:

·         Meaningful and appropriate touch,

·         A spoken message,

·         Attaching high value to the one being blessed,

·         Picturing a special future for him or her, and

·         An active commitment to succeed by fulfilling the blessing you have bestowed upon them.

[This book also includes a wonderful chapter on "How To Give the Blessing To Your Spouse!"]

In my experience as a pastor over four decades and holding an M.A. in counseling, I would make the following statement without hesitation:

If you’re only going to read one book on parenting,

make it THE BLESSING, by John Trent and Gary Smalley!

Every child needs to be thought of as special and a unique gift from God!  They must know that they hold a place of high value to their parents.  Open expressions of favoritism is damaging to siblings!  It creates problems that will travel with these children throughout their lifetimes! 

Children need to be celebrated!  Their achievements must be recognized and applauded – especially by parents!  They must know that they hold a treasured spot in your hearts! 

Speaking as a counselor, many of the adjustment issues of adults track back to feelings of inadequacy that were implanted during childhood!  A parent’s words weigh HEAVY!  As parents, we must be especially careful with the use of our words.  Shunning a child because of anger or disappointment leaves a mark that can change their entire course of direction! 

During our child-rearing years, I tried to listen to two radio programs every day:

Ø  Focus On The Family – then featuring the teaching/ministry of Dr. James Dobson

Ø  Family Life Today – then featuring the teaching/ministry of Dennis Rainey

These programs and their many guests provided daily inspiration and instruction on raising a family and keeping a marriage healthy and growing!  I bought and read their books as well as listening to their programs.  One of the largest sections of my personal library was the 'Parenting' section!  Later, Debbie and I had numerous opportunities to pass on what we had learned to other couples. 

Left to our own devices, we will inevitably fall back on the way we were raised in working with our own children.  Most of us would readily admit that the patterns and techniques of our parents were at least partially flawed.  We must be caring enough to make the effort to be well-informed parents.

Let’s not make the mistakes that Jacob made.  Regardless if you had great parents or disconnected parents, or absentee parents [for a host of possible reasons], or distracted parents, or overly strict parents – DO YOUR BEST TO BE THE BEST PARENT YOU CAN BE!   Your kids’ future health depends on it!

PARENTING - JACOB'S FAILURES WITH JOSEPH!

Surmise  -  definition:  to form a notion about something from scanty evidence.  [Merriam-Webster]

That's what I'll be doing in this blog.

In Genesis 37, Jacob has settled in Canaan – the land of his fathers, Abraham and Isaac.  The narrator of this story then continues Jacob’s story by following the life of one of his youngest sons – Joseph.

Joseph is first of two sons born to Rachael.  At this point in our story Joseph is a young man – perhaps even a teenager.  He has not lived a normal life!  He is the favorite son of his father, Jacob [also known as Israel].  Jacob dotes on Joseph, even to the point of making a colorful robe with long sleeves for him to wear.  His ten half-brothers see the favor that Joseph receives from their father and become intensely jealous of him!

We can only assume that Joseph is naïve, spoiled and immature.  This is where the surmising comes into play.

It seems that God may have wanted to give Joseph a glimpse of the future to encourage and guide him.  Consequently, Joseph has a dream that portrays him as being over his brothers to such an extent that they bow down to him!  In a second dream, even his father and mother bow down before him along with the brothers! 

Joseph would have been wise to have kept these dreams to himself, but he didn’t.  He foolishly shared them with his brothers and even his father.  The result was predictable.  The brothers grew to hate Joseph even more and even Jacob scolded him for his grandiose imagination! 

This deepening animosity from the brothers against Joseph grew significantly.  They also saw the light duty that Joseph was assigned as a message-carrier and one who reported on the work of his brothers. 

Most of you know the rest of this story.  The brothers conspire first to kill Joseph.  Then, his oldest brother, Reuben, convinced them to just throw Joseph into a pit – planning to come back later and rescue him.  However, while Reuben is watching the flocks, a caravan comes by and Judah convinces the brothers to sell Joseph to the Ishmaelites.  Our chapter ends with Joseph being sold in Egypt to a man named Potiphar who is one of Pharaoh’s officers and the captain of the guard.

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Many will remember that ultimately Joseph becomes a ruler in Egypt second only to the Pharaoh!  In such a position, he is able to rescue his family back in Canaan from a terrible, extensive draught!  He moves his entire family to Egypt where he can protect them, but eventually – after Joseph dies – the Hebrews become slaves to the Egyptians! 

This, of course, sets up the need for a savior and the call of Moses to lead the children of Israel out of Egypt! 

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So, what do we learn from Genesis 37? 

The lessons seem rather obvious:

Young people are not fully developed!  They are immature!  Their brains will not be fully grown until they reach the age of about twenty-six!  Consequently, we can expect them to make unwise decisions.  Doing so is part of their growing and maturing process!  It’s one of the ways that they learn!  Experience is a great teacher! 

God has given them resources for this period that can be a great aid to them as they pass through adolescence and into adulthood.  The most effective of these resources are parents!  They brought this child into the world and – hopefully – they love this child immensely!  They care about his/her development and growth!  They have aspirations for them to achieve their goals and fulfill their dreams.  Having been through this growth process themselves, parents can put up guard-rails and provide guidance that will allow their child to flourish and – hopefully – avoid at least some of the painful pitfalls of growing up! 

However, there are inherent challenges and obstacles involved in this process.  It’s natural to love and care for a baby – or even toddler.  They’re totally dependent on the care and devotion of the parents.  However, as the child grows and begins to develop their personality [which typically is fully developed by age seven], they are a little more challenging to love and guide!  These early, developmental years demand time and attention from parents that can be exhausting! 

Add to this the fact that parents are frequently distracted by their own goals and objectives, and consequently give less attention to their growing and developing children – even at times, turning much of their supervision over to caregivers, day-care-centers, schools and peers! 

Then, when adolescence begins to affect this growing child, all kinds of new skills and approaches will be required for the parents!  It is essential that these parents not disengage and leave their child to find their own way through the maze of social engagement.  Peers’ influence will become supreme during these years!  Our teens need supervision and accountability more than ever through this extended stage!  Even though they may not seem to want the involvement of their parents, they desperately need it! 

Parents must not withdraw during this inevitable developmental period!  Their counsel, guidance, support, guidelines and attention are essential to helping their child develop into a healthy, mature and wise adult!  This guidance must not be smothering!  It should allow the young person to experiment with decision-making and then deal with the consequences of their actions.  Parents must be available to help debrief experiences and help dissect and examine the consequences and learn from them.  This must be done in a calm, supportive environment – not one of rage and belittling! 

Parents must not give up!  Believe it or not, the teen years are the most important years for you to stay engaged in your child’s life!  It’s a zoo out there and they need guidance and protection!  That is your role! 

Keep the channels open consistently.  Make sure they know that they can turn to you in any and all circumstances!  Open doors of communication daily and engage them!  One of my personal tips is to keep visiting them at bedtime.  Sit on their bed and ask them about their day.  There is something about this time of day that causes reflection; if they’re troubled, they might open up to you! 

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Joseph turned out alright because God was guiding and directing his life!  That’s abundantly clear from his storyline! 

God will also be at work in your child’s life!  The more you can surround them with godly influences – the better it will be! 

They’re more likely to make Christian friends in church!  Youth pastors can be an immense influence in your teens’ lives! 

Talk to God about your children daily!  Pray WITH them!  What could be more important?  Entrust them to His care and engage with them every day so they KNOW the depth of your caring! 

Watch for a follow-up blog soon!

CAMPING

I’ve been a camper most of my life. 

When I was growing up in the 1950’s and 1960’s, that was pretty much our only vacation.  My dad had a lot of seniority in the nail mill where he worked, so he could get summer weeks off.  We camped in a tent and cooked on a Coleman stove.  We almost always went to the Allegheny Mountains on the border of Pennsylvania and New York, near Salamanca, NY.  We’d typically stay for two weeks.  Dad did a lot of the cooking and we ate good meals.  Their best friends, Speed and Estella Fisher, always accompanied us.  The Fisher’s kids were my sister’s age, so I was pretty much a loner.

When we arrived, he and Speed and I would go to a nearby lumber mill and load up on wood.  Dad had a roof carrier to carry our tent and all the camping gear.  With it emptied, he’d lift me up to the roof and they’d hand me the wood so I could stack it neatly; then they’d fill the trunk and we’d be good for the duration of the trip.  It made me feel important to be able to help.   

We’d swim in the Red House Lake in the afternoons and occasionally go to the park’s dump in the evening in hopes of seeing bear.  It was pretty exciting!  Some guys would feed them hot dogs and marshmallows – getting remarkably close to them. 

The campfire, however, was the main time of the day for us.  We’d sit around the campfire and I’d listen as everybody told stories and laughed heartily.  We’d eat marshmallows and occasionally make popcorn over the fire.  Quite often, we’d be visited by raccoons and they enjoyed the marshmallows as much as we did! 

We all slept in an umbrella tent with mom and dad on cots while Beverly and I slept in sleeping bags on air mattresses.  Campers were available in those days, but I was a teenager before my parents bought their first camping trailer. 

Games were popular back then; we’d play Rook, Stadium Checkers, Monopoly and a few others.  I was often allowed to play and it was a fun, family time.

My parents got into camping when I was about two years old [1954-5].  My dad took several weeks of vacation and took our whole family on a trip out west.  No hotels – we camped along the way.  My only memory of this trip is based on movies that my dad took as we travelled.  I do know that we hit Seattle [where dad’s best, boyhood friend lived with his wife and family.  He was my namesake:  Harold McNeese.]  We saw the California Redwoods and also the Grand Canyon.  I was potty-trained on this trip because all gas stations had a two-hole outhouse.  My dad would sit me up beside him and I learned to ‘go potty’.  J  Sorry!  TMI?

Camping was – from that time on – our annual vacation. 

Debbie and I followed suit when we were married [August 11, 1973].  We inherited their umbrella tent which we used for a number of years.  Eventually we went through several pop-up campers as we raised our family.  It was an inexpensive vacation in those days.  We’d haul our kids' hot-cycles and bikes along and they had the run of the campground.  We went to Pymatuning Lake [on the border of Pennsylvania and Ohio] for a week or two almost every summer!  Usually these trips included Deb’s sister, Laurie, and her husband, Charlie Mahosky.  They also had three kids – Marshal, Barbie and Jesse – who were about the same age as our kids: Travis, Troy and Tracie.  Swimming, water slides, bike riding, canoeing and riding in Uncle Charlie’s boat were the activities we enjoyed – along with, of course, playing lots of games. 

My love for the outdoors and hiking eventually led me to develop an interest in backpacking.  I’ve hiked major portions of the North Country Trail from the Ohio line through Pennsylvania and into New York State.  As the kids grew older, I began backpacking with a close friend, Tom Roush.  He taught me what I needed to know, having been a boy scout.  We hiked the Laurel Highlands Hiking Trail together several times [a 70-mile trail in southwestern Pennsylvania]. 

Most of my backpacking, however, has been done alone.  It was adventurous and gave me lots of time for solitude and developing my own skills.  Consequently, I’ve spent hundreds of nights alone on various trails – including three hundred miles on the famous Appalachian Trail in 2018.  Over the years of my ministry, I’ve taken several groups from the churches I served on backpacking trips over the years – even coed groups!  Too many stories to tell for this blog!  J

Debbie and I are camping as I write this article.  We’re celebrating our fifty-first anniversary at Geneva-On-The-Lake [Ohio] for several days.  We have a nice camper now.  About ten years ago we graduated from pop-ups to hard-tops.  We camp alone sometimes, but often with a large group of family and friends!  On a pastor’s salary, it’s been a great way for us to travel, explore and get away from the normal pressures of life.

For quite a number of years, we camped in my sister, Beverly’s back yard in Rochester, New York.  They were kind enough to feed us and let us swim to our heart’s content in their backyard pool.  Great memories of cook-outs, playing video games and trips to the Rochester Zoo – which was a great adventure!  We’d also occasionally add a trip to Lake Erie and Niagara Falls!

Camping today is not as cheap as it used to be, but it’s still a great way to see new places and have tons of fun.  As the kids were growing up, we went almost every summer to Punderson State Park – near Aurora, Ohio - so that we could visit Geauga Lake Amusement Park one day and then Sea World the next day!  Great vacations and precious memories were made! 

This week we’ve enjoyed just being together alone.  We each brought a novel along.  We’ve split our time eating in the camper some and eating out a few times too.  A lot of times, we’ve played games – but not this trip.  We’ve just enjoyed being lazy and being together. 

I’ve always wanted to take our grandkids – Rylie and Coltin – on a one-night backpacking trip along with their uncle Troy.  But they’ve always lived too far away to make that happen.  Sad!  😒

As we’re hitting our mid-70’s, we’re finding it a bit challenging to do the work needed to prepare for camping trips.  We always dreamed of doing a cross-country vacation to see parts of this land that we’ve never been to, but that dream is seeming less likely to happen now.  But, maybe…

Pardon my late-night ramblings; I just came in from watching the campfire die out.  Deb and Gabe are sleeping.  I will be too – shortly. 

It’s been a good way for us to entertain ourselves and our family through the years.  I have no regrets about these experiences.  We made lots of good memories!  As long as I can hook it up and haul it, we’ll keep at it.  We talked today about how laid-back we are when camping; it gets us away from the responsibilities of home and work.  Now, more than ever, it’s a time for reflection and enjoying one another!  I highly recommend it!  😊

THE BEST BOSS!

Back in early February (2024), I received a call from my Conference Superintendent, Matt Poole.  He asked for a meeting with me, so we scheduled  a get-together at a Chinese restaurant in Steubenville, OH.

I had retired in June of 2017.  I took a year to get our new home established and landscaped.  Our son, Troy, and I also built a two-car garage that same year [with guidance and help from his father-in-law (and my friend), Mark Noel.  It was a great year! 

Then, I fell into a slump of watching too much news and television.  I recognized that this was not good, so started looking for work.  I was hired by the Lyft company and worked for five years driving people around.  I enjoyed the work, made lots of new friends, occasionally shared my faith and gained an income to help us in our retirement.

At the end of July, 2023, I lost this job very suddenly.  We were forced to make some major adjustments.  I then created a list of projects I wanted to work on while I still had strength and time.  That kept me pretty busy for a good while (there are still things on that list)!  J

But, with my new situation I fell out of frequent contact with others.  My life was spent largely working in my home-study.  Debbie and a few neighbors became my circle of contacts along with attendance at church on Sundays.  I saw this as ‘not good’.  So, I began praying for God to open a door for me to have a greater influence and more contact with people. 

When I met with Supt. Matt, he offered me an opportunity to be an Interim Pastor at The Foundery Free Methodist Church in Wellsburg, WV.  After telling me about the church, he asked “Do you need some time to pray about this?”

I immediately responded, “No.  Count me in!”  I could see the surprise on his face, so I explained my situation and told him that I’d already been praying that God would open new vistas for me.  His offer was clearly an answer to my prayers!  He smiled.

I began my new leadership role shortly after our meeting and continue there at present.  Although my six-month contract is almost up, it looks like I’ll be extending my role for a few more months.  It’s been a great appointment with some major challenges, but God has always equipped me to offer sincere, bold and God-directed leadership!  I’ve enjoyed being ‘back in the saddle again’.  I believe that God has honored this arrangement with fruit and health in the church!  I thank Him daily for the opportunity. 

I don’t know what will follow when The Foundery is appointed a new lead pastor, but I know that I’ll continue to make myself available to Him for whatever He might bring my way.  I know two things:

1.     I still have a to-do list that I want to go back to work on…and,

2.     I know that I still dream about church-planting.

Can you do that at 72? 

The answer is clearly – YES, if God is in it!  I have read books over the years about people my age and older who planted churches. 

Will it happen?  I don’t know.  But I do know that I’ll be making myself available to the Lord of the Church.  I’ve still got some energy.  My creative juices haven’t dried up yet!  He’s cultivated in me pastoral experience, biblical knowledge, a love for people, some writing and speaking skills and a passion for seeing the Kingdom grow and believers get established.   

How about you?

Are you stretching and growing – regardless of your age or stage of life? 

Do you still have dreams to fulfill?

Are you making yourself available to God to help Him with His harvest?

You haven’t stopped contributing to His urgent work of winning the lost and discouraged – have you?

I prayed for God to open a door – AND HE DID! 

He doesn’t love me any more than he loves you!  Turn your ear upward, my friend!  It’s always an adventure when you’re employed by the Maker and Creator of all that exists!!!!!

WILL YOU MARRY ME AND MY FIANCE?

Consider this your coffee-break for this morning.  Get comfortable while I unravel a story that will remind us how creative our God is in making connections.

It was 1985.  I was in my third year of leading the Oakland Free Methodist Church in East Liverpool. 

Early in March, I was in my office working and the phone rang.  On the other end of the line was a woman who described herself as being from Youngstown.  She told me that she’d been calling pastors for several days to see if she could find one that would marry her and her fiancé.  But she had received refusal after refusal.  I could hear the pleading and frustration in her voice as she practically begged me to consider her request.

I told her that I had requirements for couples that I married.  Then I explained that I required ten hours of premarital counseling that would help them think through issues relevant to being married.  It would also be required that they attend morning worship throughout the weeks between now and the wedding.  I also told her that I asked couples to refrain from having a sexual relationship during the period between now and the wedding and assured her that I would explain this more in the first counseling session.

She immediately responded that she’d talk with her fiancé and get back to me.  She called back in less than half-an-hour with an enthusiastic response and an expression of gratitude and excitement!  We scheduled their first appointment.

Upon their arrival, I realized that they were probably in their thirties.  They were an attractive couple who were obviously very much in love and very excited to get this process started.  They were each remarkably open and friendly.  It seemed that they were actually excited to see what this process was going to involve.

We spent that first session just gathering history and getting acquainted.  I reviewed the requirements that I had mentioned on the phone and then explained how much joy God took in marriage.  I talked about the sanctity of marriage and how God had designed this relationship for the deepest expression of intimacy.  This, of course, is why I asked couples to refrain from sexual contact during the pre-marriage period so that they could genuinely – and with anticipation – celebrate their marriage after the ceremony.

They agreed and seemed excited to do so. 

They began attending worship that week and never missed a Sunday. 

Let’s call them Karen and Jeff.  Jeff had been raised in the Catholic Church.

Our congregation had just begun to grow in the area of young couples at this time, so they were warmly welcomed by others from their age group.  Karen immediately began quizzing me on aspects of our worship and the weekly bulletin. 

·        What do all the letters in the “flyer” mean?  Upon examining it I realized that our lingo was confusing to newcomers:  FMY [Free Methodist Youth], CLC [Christian Life Club], WMFI [Women’s Missionary Fellowship International], etc., etc..

·        She was curious about the songs we sang and wanted to know where she could buy copies.  At the time, the 1980’s explosion of ‘Praise & Worship’ music was impacting the Church.  I gave her some radio stations to listen to.

·        She wanted to understand why people went to the altar at the end of the service.  I explained that it was a time and place for people to respond to God.  She was surprised to learn that family and friends often joined them at the altar to pray about issues in their lives.

They came every week.  The counseling time was delightful as they sucked up all the information that I shared with them:

ü We discussed the five ‘Love Languages’.

ü We talked about the importance of clarity about money management in a marriage.

ü We discussed children and how they impacted a marriage.

ü We had a session on “How to Fight Fair” in a marriage.

ü We looked at the sexual relationship as God’s special gift for married couples to fully know and enjoy one another.

ü We talked a lot about the differences between men and women and how challenging it is to fully understand one another.

It was fun to work with this couple!  We became friends.

As the church moved through the Lenten season, I had worked with several area Free Methodist Churches to hold an ‘Interchurch Resurrection Campaign’ at Oakland over Easter weekend.  I arranged for retired bishop, Paul N. Ellis, to be our speaker from Monday through Wednesday.  Several of the area churches contributed music specials and I involved the other pastors in leading the services.  Unfortunately, Bishop Ellis had to miss the first two nights.  He felt terrible!  I managed to have a friend fill in on Monday and Tuesday.

Jeff and Karen came all three nights!  On Wednesday night, Bishop Ellis brought a dynamic message and invited those who wanted to accept Christ as their Lord to come and kneel at the altar.  Jeff immediately responded.  Bishop Ellis personally came to Jeff and he and I prayed with him. 

[As a caveat, I later realized that with Jeff’s Catholic background, it meant a great deal to him that a bishop personally prayed over him!]

A few weeks later, the wedding went beautifully!  The reception was at the Mountaineer Casino and Resort. 

Let’s end this wonderful story with a humorous revelation.  As Jeff and Karen danced, I suddenly realized that they were probably going to invite us to dance with them.  I panicked!  I don’t know how to dance.  To add to it, Karen wore a very low-cut wedding dress and I felt stressed out about dancing with her! 

Sure enough, they motioned for us to join them – with the photographer ready to document the moment.  As we walked onto the dancefloor, Jeff approached me and said, “Pastor, why don’t you just enjoy dancing with your wife while I enjoy dancing with mine!”  Did he sense my discomfort?  I’ll never know, but I certainly did feel instant relief. 

I’ve thought of them many times over the years, but we did not stay in contact.  I hope they’re out there somewhere getting ready to celebrate thirty-nine years of marriage!