MOM

It’s remarkable to me that I have written far more about my dad than I have about my mom.  As much as I loved and respected my dad, he was far less engaged with me than my mom was.  She was clearly the primary parent – the real molder and shaper of who I was to become.

She died in 1981 from complications related to her heart.  She lived long enough for our daughter, Tracie, to be born and even held her once.  Unfortunately, neither Troy nor Tracie have any memories of her.  However, she doted on Travis when given the opportunity and went to extremes to influence him. 

She amazed me in so many ways! 

She always knew when I was faking sickness because I didn’t want to go to school [probably because of a test or not having my homework finished].  She would take my temperature and tell me to go ahead and go. Then she would add that if I still felt badly later in the morning, have the nurse call and she would come to bring me home. 

She had been raised in a Scottish Presbyterian home and then aligned with the Free Methodists after marrying my dad.  I wonder if there were any discussions about that?  It certainly represented a pretty significant theological change. 

The Free Methodists during that time were practicing a very legalistic form of faith.  It could probably be best described by a statement I read in a Tim Hansel book:

“Christians don’t dance.
Christians don’t drink.
Christians don’t swear.
Christians don’t smoke…and
Christians don’t like each other.” [Holy Sweat, p.107]

A group of women quickly took my mom to the back of the sanctuary and told her that to be a good Free Methodist, she would have to remove her diamond ring.  My dad had bought that beautiful ‘basket-weave’ ring at a ‘close-out’ auction on 7^th Avenue in Beaver Falls.  But she removed it and tucked it away in her dresser for the next forty years! 

Eventually, her eyes were opened to the foolishness of her actions when she became active with a vibrant group of Christian businesswomen who wore exceptionally nice clothes and excessively beautiful jewelry.  Her comment to my dad was: “Leonard, these women are so full of the Holy Spirit!, and they really know how to pray!”   

The ring came out and she wore it until 1973, when she gave it to her poor son to use as his engagement gift to his fiancé.  😉  [to read that blog article: https://hal-lelujah.blogspot.com/2011/12/engagement.html]

She was a proud home-maker! Her day was spent doing the laundry, cleaning the house, preparing meals, and raising her family!  Married August 17, 1934, their first child – Jeannette - came along in February of 1937.  Ira followed in 1940. Beverly was born in 1944.  And I was their only baby-boomer, born in January, 1952.  The parenting role that began in 1937 finally came to a conclusion in 1969 when I graduated from high school and left home.  That’s thirty-two years she invested in raising, training and releasing us! 

Her extra-curricular activities were centered around serving the church.  She held many roles over the years:

o Sunday School teacher,
o Cradle Roll Director
o Women’s Missionary Society [WMS] president
o Pittsburgh Conference WMS president for a number of years
o She was an elected delegate [twice] to the Free Methodist National WMS Conference
o As WMS Director, she developed an evangelism program referred to as ‘Coffee-Cup Evangelism’ and promoted it aggressively across the Pittsburgh Conference

Although my dad said the prayer before our evening meal each night, my mom was clearly the spiritual leader of our home!  It was she who taught each of us to pray at the side of our bed!  It was she who built excitement in us as ‘the Lord’s Day’ approached!  It was she who modeled a love for God’s Word constantly before our eyes! 

For many years, she kept a plastic loaf of bread on our table that was filled with small cards that included verses from the Bible.  Someone would be delegated to draw out a card and read it before our evening meal.

Her outstanding gift was hospitality!  I often wonder who wound up with her ‘Guest Book’?  It was a long list of missionaries and denominational leaders who had stayed in our home or eaten at our table!  Most Sundays, our table was filled with guests and opened to its full length!  She had done as much preparation on Saturday evening as possible [potatoes were ALWAYS peeled and covered with water on Saturday evenings]!

Oh yes! Part of her Scottish Presbyterian background included a strict observance of the Lord’s Day!  In our home, there was no television, no games, no outdoor playing on Sundays.  It was a challenge growing up in that environment.  Eventually, dad decided that we could watch television after returning home from the evening service.  I also recall a few times that he took me out in the front yard and threw a ball with me; I’m sure my mom was not happy about that! 

She was also a staunch prohibitionist!  She was a member of the Prohibitionist Party.  She was a leader in the Women’s Christian Temperance Union [WCTU].  !  [For a humorous story see: https://hal-lelujah.blogspot.com/2011/12/egg-nog.html]

But her strong belief system anchored each of us.  All four of us lived out our faith by following in the ways that she had initiated in our lives

After the death of both of my parents, I was gifted with their Bibles.  My mom’s are a treasure-chest of notes, dates and observations.  She went through two, with the first one being given a home-made cover with pockets to hold all of her prayer lists.  She believed in the power of prayer!  Of all the things that she modeled for me – THIS IS THE MOST VALUABLE!  She believed in prayer and practiced it!  Her faith was childlike!  She prayed about all things!  Her Bible is stuffed with lists of people that she had promised to pray for!  I always knew that her prayers followed me!

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Not many folks remember my mom.  I was only 29 when she died!  I know she was proud of me being in the ministry. 

After all these years, I confess that I don’t consciously think of her every day.  That makes me sad, since her impact was so dominant! 

But I do recall that after graduation, I was ready to leave the nest.  Even at the young age of seventeen, I was ready to spread my wings.  Thanks to her foundation-building, I never strayed far from the path she set my feet on. 

I have several pictures of her in my study.  When I examine those pictures, I do so with the knowledge that she set my feet firmly on the path that I still continue following.  Essentially, she’s the one who led me to the Lord!  She wanted me to know Him intimately and modeled a godly life for me faithfully! 

Thanks, Mom!  I’m looking forward to seeing you again someday – probably not too far off!  I love You! 

Your youngest, [the baby] 😊

Harold

 

PS  -  Don’t be confused if you hear a bunch of people referring to me as Hal.  After you and dad were gone I shortened my name a bit.  But I’m still your son!  ❤

 

PPS  -   I mostly remember my mom as being robust woman.  However, her diabetes and heart problems eventually caused her to lose a lot of weight.  She ultimately became quite frail.  A lot of the pictures that remain are of her and dad camping.  They LOVED their little camping trailer and being part of the ‘Happy Wanderers’ camping club!  Eventually, they brought their camper to the Tri-State Campground each year for Family Camp!