Ten Coins

Is it too much for us to humble ourselves? 

What does humility look like?  Does it mean weak or poor?  Does it imply that you will be a door-mat for people to walk on? Does it imply passivity?  Can a humble person be successful? 

No!  Discard these illegitimate notions.  Humility is grossly misunderstood.  Jesus performed the greatest act of humility in history:  He left Heaven to be born as a human baby!  Was Jesus weak?  Was He poor?  Was He passive?  Did He succeed at His mission? 

We need a corrected view of humility.  Notice the following verse from Proverbs:  (29:23)  “Pride lands you flat on your face;  humility prepares you for honors.” ™  What?  Read that again:  “Pride lands you flat on your face;  humility prepares you for honors.” ™  

I read a book that defined humility as “an attitude of personal modesty, which recognizes that self’s priorities and preferences should be held in check so that others’ needs can also be addressed.”  Rather than focusing on self’s agenda only, humility causes people to consider their needs in the context of the greater world.  [The Significance Principle, Les Carter and Jim Underwood, p.44]

     Near the end of 1996, Kingston Technology Corporation, a California-based computer memory products maker, made headlines across the country.  Three months earlier Japan’s Softbank Corporation had agreed to pay $1.5 billion dollars for a controlling interest in the company, making its founders, John Tu and David Sun, enormously wealthy.  But as exciting as the buyout was, that is not what made headlines. 

     At that year’s office Christmas party, Tu and Sun announced to their 523 employees that they would be receiving $100 million in bonuses.  Forty million would be paid immediately, with the remaining sixty million set aside for future bonuses.  The average bonus amounted to slightly more than $76,000, while some were slated to receive up to $300,000.

     Employees were thrilled…but not surprised.  One employee explained, “Several times a year David and John make these spontaneous gestures.  There’s an envelope on your desk and you open it and say, ‘Thank God I work for this company.’  Then you put the envelope away and start working twice as hard.” 

     Tu said he could use only so much money for himself and added, “We want to do a lot of things to return to the community, the people who have made this possible.” 

 Humble people see beyond their own needs.  The word balance describes them best since they are neither too selfish nor too deferring.  Unlike people who worry about jockeying for prime assignments or for special treatment, humble people do not take themselves too seriously.  A sense of community, not ego, seems to drive these people. 

In order to have an appropriate measure of humility, one must also have a healthy sense of pride.  Healthy pride realizes that personal significance is never achieved by undercutting others.  Persons with healthy pride want to establish themselves as viable, respectable individuals, and to that end cooperate with the larger community. 

Is there a check-list for keeping humility in balance?  Some starter thoughts:

ü  Do I nurse thoughts of envy or jealousy?

ü  Am I an angry person?  Do I hold a grudge?

ü  Do I notice and affirm the positives in other people?

ü  When something good happens to someone else, do I think, I wish that would happen to me?

ü  Do I get caught up in my own busyness so much that I overlook others’ needs or feelings?

ü  Do I work hard to cover my negatives, not wanting others to know my weaknesses?

ü  Do I withdraw from people, even when I know it may not be the best?

ü  Do I get defensive when someone suggests improvements I could make?

ü  Do I secretly wish others would handle problems with the same common sense that I use?

ü  Is maintaining a proper image so important to me that I deliberately misrepresent myself to others?

ü  Do I interrupt others too easily in mid-sentence?

ü  Do others see me as hard-headed or stubborn?

In all seriousness:  Are you as aware as I am of how far I am from genuine humility?  Is the Holy Spirit as faithful with you as He is with me at pointing out my persistent sense of pride?  Do you lose that sincere experience of humility as quickly as I do?  Suddenly, I’m so humble that I’m proud of my humility!  J  Are you as plagued as I am with the notion that it’s all about me?  Do you have to fight pride and self-centeredness as hard as I do?  Are you occasionally embarrassed at how deft we’ve become at bringing the conversation around to our achievements or interests? 

What’s the cure for this insatiable need/desire for attention?

There was only one Perfect Man!  I’m convinced that all of us will struggle with personal pride and self-centeredness as long as our feet are firmly planted on this earth.  Some of us will make small gains.  I read a wonderful story about Mother Teresa.  When she had been awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, someone came up to her and asked her if there wasn’t at least a little pride in having received such a noteworthy award.  Her response was golden.  She asked the person:  "When Jesus was coming into Jerusalem for His Triumphal Entry, do you suppose for a moment that the donkey thought all of the fanfare was for him?" 

How many times do we accept the praise, when in reality it should go to others or to God?  The late singer, song-writer, and musician, Larry Norman developed a simple way to direct people’s praise not to him but to his Lord:  the one-way sign (index finger pointing to the heavens)!

I read this week of a woman who begins every day with ten coins in one pocket.  Every time she compliments someone, she takes one of the coins out of that pocket and puts it in the other.  If she slips up and criticizes someone, she moves a coin back to the first pocket.  At the end of the day, the emptying of her pockets is a ritual of evaluation on her humility!

What a wonderful way for us to intentionally gauge our humility. 

Jesus’ humility was purposeful.  He came to show us what God was like.  He came to reveal the Father!  He modeled perfect dependence on God.  He gave us a vivid picture of what it would look like to live full of the Holy Spirit!  He modeled the godly life flawlessly and then beckoned to us saying:  “Be perfect as your heavenly Father is perfect”.

Ken's Faults

[Ken is Kenneth W. Whippo, my father-in-law.]

When Tommy (Whippo) asked me to speak at his father's funeral, he told me that Danny (Whippo) and Marshall (Mahosky) would also be giving tributes.  I realized right away that they would have lots of nice things to say about Ken, so I immediately decided that I would take a different approach and talk about Ken’s faults.  A little advice:  never ask a son-in-law to do a tribute at a funeral for his father-in-law.  I mean, let’s admit it, even the best of us have faults.

Ken – especially in his younger years – was a fearsome man!  He was tough to work with.  He had high expectations and was demanding!  In those early years all of us – at one time or another – worked in the barn!  One day, I was in the pen working with Ken to separate the pigs that were marked and ready to be sold.  This was a challenging job because the pigs didn’t want to leave the familiarity of the pen.  So we wielded large pieces of plywood to separate the pig and force it toward the gate.  At that point Wally or Tommy would pick it up and run it down the aisle to the ramp that led to the truck.  There was always another battle there because the pigs didn’t like the ramp.  It was made of wood and was on an angle, so they would often balk.  But once one of the boys got the pig to the ramp, another boy took over with an electric prodder to get the pig up the ramp and onto the truck.

I’ve lost track now of who was running the pigs down the aisle;  but I do remember how small Tommy and Wally were at this point.  I’m guessing they were 10 and 12.  Whichever one it was got an obstinate pig.  Halfway down the aisle it decided it wanted to go back to the safety of the pen and started to climb the wall in hopes of turning around in the narrow space.  Ken noticed this problem from our work in the pen and hollered loudly and authoritatively:  “Don’t let that pig turn around!” 

It was in that moment – driven by fear of a father more than fear of a 220-pound pig – that a sixty-pound little kid threw himself on that hog and wrested it back into the right direction!  Ken was a tough guy to work with!

I’ve also noted over the years that he could be rather rude.  For instance, I have been with him over many meals at the farm, in our home and even in restaurants.  After the meal, Ken always treasured a sweet dessert.  Since Dolores and her daughters are all excellent pie-makers, we would often have pie for dessert.  Over and over, I have heard him complain about the pie that someone had worked so hard to produce! 

Here’s how it would usually unfold.  He would quickly and completely consume the piece of pie.  When his hostess, or the creator of the pie, would ask him how it was he would rudely respond:  “There’s only one thing wrong with that pie!”  He always had a twinkle in his eye when he said it, but can you believe how rude he was to do this?  [What was his answer?  “It was too small!]  J

He could also be a bit of a complainer.  A group of us were traveling home from Peter and Janie’s a few years ago.  We stopped half-way to spend the night in a hotel to break up the trip.  In the evening, we went to a local restaurant for a meal.  We were assigned a new waitress who served us very poorly.  We had to wait an inordinate time for our drinks.  When they did come, they were wrong.  It took forever for her to write down our orders.  Then it took forever for the food to arrive.  I have to admit that it was the worst service I have ever received in a restaurant.

Her poor service became the topic of our whole conversation at that table as we all marveled at the poor job she was doing.  Ken led the group in complaints.  He was incredulous that she was doing so poorly.  I think we ended up being at the table for two hours that night as she fumbled to serve us unsuccessfully.  At some point, it became so ridiculous that we simply giggled and laughed at her mis-steps.

Finally, the evening came to an end.  Imagine my surprise when Ken insisted on leaving her a very large tip.  As we were leaving the restaurant, he stepped to the side and spoke to her privately.  I wonder what he said to her?

Another fault of Ken’s was that he was openly biased.  Even though it was often directed toward my own wife, Debbie, I still always felt it was wrong of him.  I can’t tell you how many times I have seen him pull her close and tell her that she was his favorite daughter.  Even though I could understand his bias, was it really fair to his other daughters for him to do this?  [For the record:  Ken did this with all his daughters!]

Surely others of you have noticed this next fault I’ll mention.  Ken was impatient!  Debbie tells me that when they were young, he used to get ready for church and then sit in the car and blow the horn!

And this fault especially emerged when it came to food!   At many tables you say ‘grace’ before you eat;  but not at Ken’s table!  He was hungry, so he started to eat the minute the first plate hit the table!  Poor Dolores was still cooking some of the food while Ken was consuming the first thing she put on the table! 

                                                                                                                                          Oh, eventually, when Dolores would get all the food on the table and sit down Ken would call a stop to the eating and pronounce a clear and sincere prayer.

                                                                                                                                          This impatience almost turned into a game for Ken when he attended a wedding.  He had developed a fine-tuned skill at predicting a seating spot that would be served first!  And he not only did this, but he trained his family to do the same!  You watch at the next wedding they’re all at;  they have an uncanny skill at being at the front of the serving line!

Then, last of all, I will mention his most glaring fault:  he talked about others behind their back!  I can’t tell you how many times I have heard him do this.  I’ve heard him go on-and-on about what a good pastor Bob Singleton was.  I’ve heard him talk about Charlie (Mahosky) being the best guitar player around.  About what a good worship leader Jeff (Diddle) is.  About how skilled Peter (Knaus) is at sailing.  About how quickly Jim (Bredl) rose up in his work place and how good he is at what he does.  About how knowledgeable Dave (Bredl) is on so many subjects.  I rather suspect that he’s probably talked about me behind my back, too! 

And it doesn’t end there.  I’ve heard him talk about his work associates, his friends, and even his grandchildren behind their backs.  There just didn’t seem to be any end to this kind of talk. 

 

Well, I could go on, but I think I’ve made my point.  We all have faults, right?  Compared to a lot of other people I know, I suppose Ken’s faults weren’t really that bad.   

Mr. Whippo

I was 16 when I entered his world.  I'd known him before that, but not well.  In 1968, I began dating his oldest daughter, Debbie.  That was forty-seven years ago...

He was a formidable man.  Every young man who pursued his daughters feared him!  He was intimidating!  There was no doubt who the dominant force in this family was.  I called him Mr. Whippo for a year or two after Debbie and I were married.  Eventually, though, he became Ken. 

For many years he worked on the wire gang at J&L Steel Company in Aliquippa.  He was respected for his skill and ability in that arena.  He drove a long way to work every day and often had to leave early in the morning - he didn't like that. 

When he came home, he kept busy with the farm.  He had taken a risk in the mid-fifties and bought an 80-acre farm in Enon Valley.  After going several directions with the farm, he eventually settled on raising pigs.  In 1973, the year Debbie and I were married, the barn burned to the ground which was a tragic loss for the family.

But he quickly recovered and built a new barn.  Other buildings were added and the farm grew - especially after he pensioned out of the steel mill.  Eventually, his son, Wally, bought the farm and it continues as a strong enterprise today.

I admired Ken for his ability and fearless approach to large projects.  He used his electrical background to help every one of his kids and many of his friends.  He's done wiring work in all of our homes at one time or another

For a few years he sold log home kits.  During those years he built three log homes from the ground up.  Although these projects stretched him, he persevered and finished each project with pride and satisfaction.

Ken came to faith in Christ when Debbie was thirteen.  She says that everything changed after that.  He led his family to church and became a leader there.  Early in his faith he came under the influence of a wonderful Bible teacher named Thelma and grew significantly in his knowledge of the scriptures.  For many years he sat under the amazing teaching of Pastor Fred Schreffler, which continued to ground him in his faith and theology.

He was a strong leader in the Rochester Free Methodist Church.  He was highly respected there and served for years as the Sunday School superintendent.  He always stood behind his pastor.  He taught classes regularly and excelled in his knowledge of 'End Times' perspectives and 'Creation' studies.  Several of his children continue teaching on the subject of 'End Times' - basing their instruction on the foundations they learned from their father.

He became one of the first laymen to be Camp Director at the Tri-State Camp Association in East Liverpool.  To this day, his family gathers for the ten-day camp every July.  His influence there and the work done over the years is a testimony to his belief in the solidarity of the family! 

Ken was a life-long learner.  I was always intrigued by the books he was reading.  His interests ranged widely and I never knew him to follow any particular author.  He read world history, military books, political history, and biographies.  He could converse on subjects that were beyond many of us.

While raising their family of nine, the dinner table was a center for teaching and open conversation.  Often we stayed around the table for hours discussing subjects from the mundane to serious.  He openly shared what he was learning from the Bible with his children at that table.  In a sense, he discipled his kids by sharing his own faith development with them openly.

Ken and Dolores were excellent dancers.  Debbie remembers pushing the living room furniture back so that the children could watch as their parents danced to the music of Lawrence Welk on the television!  They were mesmerized by the scene.

In his latter years he mellowed.  The strong personality faded a bit and he became more gentle and caring.  The younger grandchildren have known him as a doting grandfather who made late-night 'Santa calls' and expressed open affection for them. 

Since Dolores had a stroke, he has been devoted to her, serving her daily and rarely leaving her side. 

Although his role of active leadership at the church has diminished, he is still highly regarded in the congregation as a stable, grounded influencer whose integrity has remained intact throughout the years.

Last evening - Christmas night - he thoroughly enjoyed being surrounded by his children and grandchildren.  Pictures reveal him smiling and reveling in the love of his family.  Late in the evening, when many had left he stretched and had a cardiac arrest.  He never regained consciousness.

Although his family is in deep grief, they will be able to live with a convincing assurance of where Ken is now.  His legacy will continue and his stories will be retold. 

Celebrating the Birth!

Almost every week, I hold a half-hour chapel service at one of three Personal Care Homes here in Kittanning:  Grey's Colonial Gardens, Grey's Colonial Manor and Grey's Colonial Acres.  These three excellent homes are owned and operated by a wonderful family from the Kittanning Free Methodist Church.

Today, I held chapel in two of these homes.  At each I ministered to about ten people.  They seem to look forward to these times and enjoy them.  Some are quite eager to participate by singing, quoting scripture or answering questions.

I showed up today with a large, gift-bag with lettering that read:  MERRY CHRISTMAS!  I told them that I had placed a very special gift in the bag - and then let their curiosity work while we read some scripture.

As I quoted the following verses, many mouthed the words along with me:

And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us;  and we beheld His glory, 

the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and glory.

For unto you is born this day in the city of David, a Savior, which is Christ the Lord.  And this shall be a sign to you, you shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger.  

Then we sang and read several of the 'story-telling' carols:  "Hark the Herald Angels Sing", "O Little Town of Bethlehem", and "We Three Kings".  

Next, we talked about the gift-giving mentioned in the last song.  We spoke of the tradition of giving gifts and the joy it brings us.  We also talked of the excessive giving that is often a distraction to the real meaning of Christmas.

Finally, we speculated about what was in my bag:  

• a fruit cake?  
• candy?
• a toy?
• a sweater?

At the peak of curiosity, I reached into the bag and gently pulled out a boy baby doll.  I cradled it in my arms as I spoke of the special gift from God. Again, they quoted along with me:

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, 

that whosoever believeth on Him should not perish but have everlasting life.

As I spoke of the significance of this spotless Lamb and the fact that He would become the Sacrifice for our sins, I passed the baby doll around the table for each one to hold for a moment.

I wish you could have seen the tenderness!  That baby doll was handled with the greatest of care.  Some kissed it.  Many of the women cradled it in their arms.  Some held it longer than others.  It was PRECIOUS!  Even the men took their turn.  

It was an object lesson that took on a life that I had not anticipated!

Have you had that kind of a moment yet this Christmas?  A moment when the spectacular message comes home to your heart?  A personal moment when you acknowledge what it's all really about?

It reminds me of a line from a famous story:

"And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow,

stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so?

It came without ribbons.  It came without tags.

It came without packages, boxes or bags.

And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore.

Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before.

What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store.

What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more."

-  Dr. Seuss,  HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS

A few seniors got it today!  This holy day does mean more than gifts and all the other distractions!

Have you gotten it?  Maybe it's time to grab a baby doll and sit for a few minutes...

A Leonard Haire Loom!

My Dad died in July, 1992.  It didn't take but a week for our family to clear his house of just about everything.  At the end of that week, I discovered that I was the executor of the estate.  Along with that office came the responsibility for clearing the final clutter from the house.

As I walked through my Dad's "shop" part of the basement, a cabinet that he had built remained.  It was not an attractive cabinet, it was a functional cabinet.  I assume that he built it.  It was very heavy!  It's 'drawers' were actually old wooden cheese cartons.  The cabinet had been built with pigeon-holes designed perfectly to house these cartons.

The cartons were loaded with screws, bolts, washers, pipe fittings, connectors, chisels, files, and a wide array of other useful-but-rarely-used-paraphernalia.  I felt drawn to it because of my belief that my Dad had made it.  It had been passed over by all the others who had gone through the house.

I labored over my decision;  it would be a giant pain to move it! 

But, sentiment won out!  I hauled it to my home in East Liverpool.  And then to Maryland.  And then to Akron.  And then to New Middletown.  And then to a storage unit for three years.

Today, I brought it to Enon Valley!  Am I sorry?

Oh no!  You cannot imagine how many times I have needed something and found it in one of those cheese cartons! 

"Dad!  Your cabinet is safe and sound in my shed!  I used several things from it today!  Thanks so much for your organizational acumen!  And thanks for giving me just what I needed so many times through the years!  Someday, when I come to see you, this thing will probably find a home in Troy's shed!  Ha ha ha ha ha..."

"I love you, Dad!  Say "Hi" to Mom for me and give her a big hug!"

      



Gift Giving #3

There are at least a couple of good reasons for giving gifts at Christmas time or anytime!

1.    Gift giving is an expression of our love for one another!

Giving and receiving gifts can be part of fulfilling what Paul says about giving in 

II Corinthians 8:7-8, "Since you excel in so many ways—you have so much faith, such gifted speakers, such knowledge, such enthusiasm, and such love for us now I want you to excel also in this gracious ministry of giving. I am not saying you must do it, even though the other churches are eager to do it. This is one way to prove your love is real."

2.    The Bible gives us the wonderful story about the gift God gave us - Christ. 

Does giving gifts have to take away from the true meaning of Christmas?  No, it does not.  If we focus on the wonderful gift of salvation the Lord has given us (Isaiah 9:6),

For to us a child is born,

to us a son is given,

and the government will be on his shoulders.

And he will be called

Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,

Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

it is a natural expression of that gratefulness for us to give to others.  The key is on our focus.  Is your focus on the gift, or the ultimate gift-giver - our gracious Heavenly Father? 

 

Back around 1998, MasterCard sponsored a variety of "Priceless" commercials. Each ad began with a list of stuff (or services) and a matching set of prices. Then came a phrase identifying some intangible that can't be purchased. And finally, there's the single word "Priceless," followed by the assertion that "There are some things money can't buy. For everything else, there's MasterCard." They were great commercials, and were popular, according to the Harris ad tracking service. The ad executive who services the "Priceless" account at the McCann-Erickson ad agency explained that "what really hit home with consumers was that a company that is fundamentally all about money and paying for things would actually declare that the things that really count can't be bought."

New iPads, iPhones, androids, video games, power tools, appliances, clothes, jewelry, and all the other things that will be given and received the 25th – all pale in comparison with the gift that is truly priceless!  There is a peace that comes from accepting the Gift of Christ into your life that cannot be attained any other way in this world!  The joy of being forgiven for our sins and of gaining a hope of eternal life is truly priceless.

 

There was another advertising campaign quite a few years ago that said it even better.  I went to the Hallmark store for a card that year and saved the bag because it said it so well:  “When you care enough to send the very best”!  That’s exactly what God did when He sent His one and only Son into the world to save us!  He cared enough to send the VERY BEST!

Gift Giving #2

Let’s consider the gifts that Jesus received:

v GOLD

     If diamonds are a woman’s best friend – then gold can’t be far behind!  Almost any adult would appreciate a gift of gold.  To give a gift of gold is equal to giving a gift of money!  Who would turn that down?  Money is good!  Right? 

     In this case, the gold was probably used to finance Joseph and Mary’s escape to Egypt.  There is no evidence to indicate that Joseph was a wealthy man.  He obviously had a trade and was capable of producing income;  however, he had just financed a costly trip to Bethlehem and was facing the transition from caring only for his own needs to caring for the needs of himself, his wife, and a newborn son!  The gift of gold given to Jesus was probably viewed as a gift from God  to enable them to be obedient to His guidance!         

v FRANKINCENSE

     Remarkably, giving gifts of fragrance is not uncommon in our day!  Many of us will either buy or receive gifts of cologne or perfume.  Others may receive gifts of potpourri, scented candles, or even incense!  Something capable of eliminating harsh or unwanted odors must have been a welcomed gift in the days of Mary and Joseph.  Who knows?  If there really were animals present at Jesus’ birth, some of that incense might have been handy right on the spot! 

     But this was not just any incense!  It was a specific incense that was rare and probably expensive.  It was almost exclusively used in the Temple and was associated with the burning of sacrifices before God.  It had to have been perceived as an odd gift to give to a newborn baby or its parents!  Its purpose was clearly symbolic.  It was a divinely inspired gift to indicate that Jesus would become the unique sacrifice for our sins.  His ultimate death on the cross would be a pleasing sacrifice to God and would satisfy the death penalty that comes on all of us as a result of our sin.

     For the record:  the frankincense was probably sold or surrendered to the Temple with the possibility of either gaining a profit for Mary and Joseph or of being a gift from them to God!

v MYRRH

     Myrrh is another perfume, but this one would have been a source of mystery to Joseph and Mary.  It was a specific perfume used almost exclusively for embalming the dead!  This would be the equivalent of buying a newborn baby a subscription to AARP magazine.  It was obviously another symbolic gift.  It was a foreshadowing of the death of Jesus.  Is it any wonder that we find Mary repeatedly pondering these things and treasuring them up in her heart? 

     Let’s remember, she was probably a young, Jewish girl.  She had been visited by an angel who told her that she would miraculously give birth to God’s Son.  A baby was conceived in her womb without the involvement of a man.  Hardship followed.  A census is called for at the critical time of her delivery.  The baby is born in a stable and His first bed is a manger.  Shepherds come, unexpectedly to worship Him.  Finally, wealthy wise men come reporting the appearance of a new star in the sky and delivering these odd gifts!  What is Mary to make of all this?

 

     When we lived in Maryland, we took training to become foster parents.  While doing so, we ran into a couple where the woman was from a large family in my hometown, New Brighton.  As we shared with this couple they told us that they only buy their children three gifts for Christmas every year.  In doing so they  control the commercial aspects of their Christmas by making a clear statement that if three gifts were good enough for Jesus – then it’s good enough for us too. 

 

     We might wonder:  Why do we exchange gifts at Christmas anyway?  Is it because the wise men brought gifts to Jesus?   Historically, the practice of gift-giving around Christmas only roots back about 200 years.  Some think that our gift-giving springs from the example of St. Nicholas who was a bishop in Asia Minor from whom many legends have arisen.  These legends all have to do with the fact that he was a man who knew how to give “so that the right hand does not know what the left hand is doing.”  Legends report several practices of this church leader:

o   He baked cookies and distributed them to poor children

o   Having come from a wealthy home, he left three bags of gold hanging on the doorknob of a poor family that had three daughters with no dowry.  Without this gift, they would have been forced into prostitution.

o   The miracle that is recorded to his credit comes from him begging grain for his starving people from passing merchant ships, promising them that at the end of their trip, not an ounce would be missing.

     The memory of this saint has been embellished and changed significantly over the centuries till he is almost unrecognizable to us now.  Is that why we give gifts at Christmas?   No!  The emphasis on St. Nicholas and gift-giving actually has hazards for us. 

 

We must be careful that gift giving doesn’t become the focus of Christmas instead of thanking the Lord for the gift of His Son (John 3:16).

Gift Giving #1

     I was in Wal-Mart and noticed a line of about 30 people waiting to exchange items.  On the days immediately following Christmas that single line will turn into multiple lines as people bring back carefully selected gifts and exchange them for the right size, another color, or something completely different. 

     I watched a report on the news that indicated that the increase in giving ‘gift cards’ is phenomenal!  In 2003, consumers purchased 45 billion dollars worth of gift certificates or gift cards;  that number is expected to escalate to over 124 billion dollars this year!  The message of this increase is obvious:  What better gift can I give you than the resources to buy the gift that you really want for yourself! 

     We all have traditions that we maintain in our various homes and families.  I have chosen to continue a tradition that originated two generations before my arrival.  My father was raised in a very common home with a caring, loving mother, five sisters, and a drunken father.  Grandma Haire had very meager resources to use to provide a nice Christmas for her family.  She was raising her children through the years of the ‘Great Depression’, which made it all-the-more difficult.  She would splurge every Christmas and place in her six children’s stockings an apple, an orange, and some walnuts.  Consequently, when I was growing up, [and by-the-way, my Christmases were not meager;  my parents used Christmas to buy me almost everything I would need to get me through the next year] my stocking also included an apple, an orange, and some walnuts.  To maintain a tradition, I faithfully placed these items in my kids’ stockings every year (along with lots of other goodies)!  Today, Tracie does the same with her children - that's four generations!  Now the further this practice gets away from its source in the depression, the less meaning it has – however, the intent is to remind us that there was a time in our family’s history when the receiving of an apple, an orange, and some walnuts was a noteworthy and even exciting thing!

     Gift-giving is an interesting thing.  For younger, and even many older folks, receiving gifts is a big deal.  We all probably look forward to Christmas Day with some anticipation of what we might receive.  However, the greater joy is really when you’re on the gift-giving side.   Almost all of us have purchased or made something special for someone.  The excitement and anticipation of seeing their joy is almost more than we can take!  That joy was magnified in my growing-up-home by having to go on a search for gifts that might be hidden almost anywhere in the house! 

     The concept of gift-giving comes under intense pressure, however, at this time of year.  We are occasionally put into circumstances that make us feel that we have to give gifts to others.  Obligatory gift exchanges take the joy and surprise out of gift-giving.  There’s an episode of Seinfeld where George is required to exchange gifts with his co-workers,  In his typically unscrupulous way, George gives out gift cards falsely indicating that he has made a contribution in the name of his co-workers to the ‘Human Fund’.  Most of us have received gifts along the way that left us confused or even unimpressed!  

So, how do we go about giving good gifts this year for Christmas?

How would you describe a good gift?

·      Something that uniquely suits me

·      Something that will save me time or make my work easier

·      Something that is home-made

·      Something that is expensive

·      Something I wouldn’t buy myself

·      Something I can really use or that I really need or want

·      Something that someone sacrificed to give

·      Something that has special meaning behind it

·      Something that was difficult to find, make, or get

·      Something that is an expression of someone’s creativity

How can we give gifts this year that will keep our friends and loved ones out of those long exchange lines?  Maybe the above list is a starting point...

Job Searching #3

When Debbie and I decided to try to go to China, I began a search for an agency to help us in that process.  I wrote to a dozen agencies with a good reputation for assisting people attain that goal.  To my surprise, all I received were a few 'canned' letters.  I think I received one phone call that was never followed up on. 

I was truly shocked!  Didn't they realize that we were a hot prospect?  We had already decided that we wanted to go;  we didn't need any persuading!  I had already turned my five-month notice in for my job!  We were ready to be led through the process of getting a work visa and lining up a job!

Still, I couldn't get anyone to talk with me seriously.

Then, it occurred to me to contact the Free Methodist Church's VISA (Volunteers In Service Abroad) Department.  I don't know why I didn't do that first.  Somehow, I guess I thought that other agencies would be more helpful.

Upon our initial contact with VISA, we were treated seriously and with great care!  Deb Miller and her team assisted us with every detail - and there were many!  They walked us through the process of filing for a visa.  They counseled and trained us to prepare us for the Chinese culture.  They connected us to an in-country representative - Lena - who helped me prepare my resume and then submit it to several universities.

As most of you know, we went to China that summer to begin the most exciting three years of our lives.  VISA provided an annual retreat for all its China teachers.  Lena visited our Changchun Team twice a year to interview us and assist with any problems we might be having. 

If I was to go back to China - and I hope we can - there would be NO HESITATION to use the services of our own VISA Department!

Job Search Tip #3
Don't despise agencies or workplaces that you are familiar with!  They may actually provide your best opportunities for finding the placement you desire! 

Job Searching #2

While in Akron, we essentially held down two full-time jobs:  Shelter Care and Cornerstone FMC.  When we moved to New Middletown, we dropped nearly $1,500 of income per month!  Again, it was essential that Debbie find a job to supplement the family income!  I moved to New Middletown first alone;  the family followed about six weeks later.

Upon her arrival, Deb immediately went to the Springfield Local Administration building to apply for work as a teacher's aid.  That day, it just so happened that the elementary school secretary was filling in at the high school for the day.  Her name is Diane, and Debbie and I have known her casually through the years since she used to attend the New Middletown Free Methodist Church.  As they chatted, Debbie told her that she was there to apply for a teacher's aid position.  It was late July.

No positions became available and we were disheartened.

Then, the first day of school arrived.  The Learning Disability Class teacher - Cindy - came to the elementary school office to report that her aid had not reported for work.  Upon contacting her they found that she had no plans to return for the new school year.  The elementary school principle and the learning disability class teacher were in an immediate dilemma!

At that moment, Diane remembered seeing Debbie at the Administration Offices back in late July.  She told the principle about Debbie, giving her a very high recommendation!  He suggested that Diane call Debbie immediately to see if she was still looking for work.

When Diane's call came, she told Debbie about the situation at the school.  She asked if Debbie would like the position and if she could begin the next day. With great joy and excitement, Debbie accepted the position and reported for work the next morning.  She was Cindy's aid for nine years until we left for China.  Her friendship with Cindy (and the other teachers) have become so meaningful to Debbie (and me).  She literally loved the job and the children that she worked with over the years.

JOB SEARCH TIP #2
When you put your application in, be friendly and speak to as many people in that workplace as you can - especially people you know!

Job Searching #1

When we moved from East Liverpool, Ohio, to Spencerville, Maryland, we were quickly overwhelmed with financial stress.  When I considered the move, the pay packages seemed quite similar despite differences in the way the package was arranged.  However, I had not accounted for the fact that we were moving from a county in Appalachia to one of the wealthiest counties in America!

Pretty quickly we realized that Debbie would need to get a job to supplement our income.  Each week we were falling further and further behind. 

One hot August afternoon, we were talking about it as we prepared our lunch.  I decided that we should pray specifically about the situation.  We went to the living room and knelt side-by-side at the couch.*  There, we poured out our hearts to the Lord and laid out our financial situation before Him.  We acknowledged our love for Him and cast our dependence on Him.

When we finished our prayer, we sat down at the table to eat our lunch.

No more than ten minutes later, as we ate our lunch, there was someone knocking on our front door.

He was a friendly looking man and very cheerful.  He acted like he knew us.  He introduced himself as Forest Grauel - a son of my oldest member at the time:  Evelyn Grauel.  He said that he lived just a mile down the road and ran a small air-conditioning business.

He reported that he needed an office manager to help him get his office, billing and paperwork organized.  As he rolled past the Free Methodist Church on Spencerville Road, the thought occurred to him that Free Methodist pastor's wives were good workers.  Consequently, here he was at our door offering the new position to Debbie  -  fifteen minutes after we got up from prayer!!!!!!

Debbie took the position and worked for Forest until we left the area.  She thoroughly enjoyed the position and we developed a wonderful relationship with Forest and his wife, Eileen.  He even hired Troy part-time and gave him some important on-the-job-training.  He was very generous with Debbie and we have always appreciated his sensitivity to the leadership of the Holy Spirit. 

JOB SEARCH TIP #1  -  Pray and believe!

*  This is called 'agreement prayer' and it is nowhere more powerful than between a husband and wife/a father and a mother!!!!!!

Retirement?

Well, the day is almost here!  After many years of working and many different jobs, she's decided it's time!

I probably won't get all the details right, but I'll give it my best shot. 

Right out of high school, her Aunt Dorothy (Whippo) brought her into the credit department of the Kaufmann's Department Store in Rochester, Pennsylvania.  She worked with a group of beautiful, young women who all became friends.  Her Grandma Whippo lived within walking distance of this store and Debbie often spent the night with her!  During a year when her parents forbid me to see Debbie, her Grandma allowed us to meet occasionally at her apartment!  He he he he...  She loved this job!

Then - after two years at Roberts Wesleyan College - she returned home to work as a receptionist for a country doctor;  everyone called him 'Doc Kennedy'.  He invited her into his office one day to watch him deliver a baby.  In the process, he looked over and saw her going pale.  He quickly instructed her to put her head between her knees.  She loved this job!

Before we were married, we made a trip to Lexington, Kentucky.  Debbie acquired a position in the loan department of the largest bank in the city:  First Security National Bank.  As newlyweds, we became close friends with several of the young women she worked with.  We had an opportunity to let our light shine on those double-dates!  Debbie loved this job!

After almost two years, Debbie got an opportunity to be hired in the Development Office of Asbury Theological Seminary.  Here she worked with some wonderful people such as Bill Brunk and Kathleen Demeray.  She was able to walk to work instead of driving to center-city Lexington.  Debbie loved this job!

Then, Travis was born!  We moved to Jeannette, Pennsylvania, where I started to lead my first church.  Then, we moved to McClellandtown where Troy and Tracie were born.  Did Debbie continue to work?  Oh yes!  We kept her quite busy!  She loved being a mother and homemaker!

Upon arriving in East Liverpool, Debbie decided to take in several other children to supplement our income.  Our kids grew up playing with Franky and Angela and Abby and Michael and Louis.  I was often met by five or six children when I would walk in the door at the end of the day!  Although it was a noisy and sometimes messy job - she loved it!

When the kids started to school, Deb was hired to be a teller at the Tri-State Federal Credit Union in East Liverpool.  She made some great friends there and came to know many of the local residents through her work.  Their flexibility with her hours was generous and Debbie loved this job!  However, when the summer-off flexibility ended, she had to quit to be with the kids.

For one year after that she worked for her brother, Wally, at the farm.  She left East Liverpool at 5:00 AM, so she could deliver pigs to Pittsburgh - I'm not kidding!  Then, upon her return, she power-washed pig pens.  The upside:  she got to see her folks every day!  I don't really think she liked this job very much!

Then, we moved to Spencerville, Maryland, where Debbie fairly quickly was hired by a nice man to be office-manager of his small, air-conditioning shop.  It was a mile from home and he was very generous with Debbie regarding pay and necessary time off.  She loved this job!

Several years later, we landed in Akron, Ohio, where Debbie and I became 'respite' and 'shelter' parents to a long line of behaviorally challenged children.  We ran a licensed home for the Shelter Care Agency for nearly six years.  Eventually, I was hired at Cornerstone Church, which left Deb carrying the bulk of responsibility with our kids.  I doubt that she'd say she loved that job; but it was very fulfilling for us!

After Akron, we landed in New Middletown, Ohio.  Debbie was quickly hired to work as a teacher's aid for the learning disabilities class.  Debbie became really close friends with her teacher, Cindy;  they were an incredible team.  Debbie loved the children and seeing improvements in their learning skills!  She worked in this position for nine years and loved every minute of it!

Then...then I dragged her off to Changchun, China, where I was contracted to teach English to university students.  The first semester, Debbie was asked to teach a freshman pronunciation class.  Although overwhelmed, her students quickly fell in love with her and she enjoyed the experience. 

The next semester, the school did not ask her to teach.   So, Debbie became active as a private tutor and developed some very special relationships as a result.

At the beginning of our second year in China, the school asked her to teach full time - which she did until we left Changchun!  She taught science majors, freshmen, graduate students, and even a class of the brightest students in the university!  She made a deep impression on her students and enjoyed every part of the experience!

Upon our return to the United States, Debbie reacquired a position as an aid at Springfield Elementary School.  However, the trauma of adjustment, Travis' death and a very different class culture has caused her to struggle;  as a result, she has decided to retire!

Yep, you heard me right!  At the young age of sixty-five she's calling it quits.  She already talks about volunteering at a church's coffee shop.  She's also mentioned the possibility of a part-time job.  So, we'll see.  But, officially, the word's out.  Forty-seven years after starting at Kaufmann's - she's finished! 

And I say a hearty congratulations to her!  She's done it all with such grace and class!  She's truly an amazing woman.  Why?

Because along with all the jobs described above, she's

• kept me comfortable and happy,
• raised three kids,
• stayed actively involved in all our churches,
• taught classes,
• maintained friendships,
• kept our home organized,
• used her gift of hospitality throughout, and
• generally improved every life she's touched.

The world needs good examples today!  I suggest that my wife is as good an example as you're going to find!  I wish her rest and joy and peace and lots of time for reading. 

My biggest wish for her?  I hope she writes her book!  She has so many stories treasured up in her heart!  I truly hope she gets them out on paper for the world to enjoy!

Anyway, this Tuesday, November 24, 2015, is her last day!  Yay!

I've Got Five Years Left

I remember when I was young, my mother claimed to have lost her sense of smell.  I didn't think much of it at the time.

Later in life, my oldest sister made the same claim.  Jeannette talked about how it affected her life and how much she missed the ability to smell.

I recently discovered that my other sister, Beverly, lost her sense of smell when she was in her forties.

You guessed it!  Sometime during the last year, my sense of smell dried up. 

It's strange.  It certainly affects your enjoyment of food!  I used to love the smell of the house when Debbie was frying ground beef and onions.  It was so wonderful when I would walk in to the smell of home-made chocolate-chip cookies or sweet rolls!  Those simple pleasures are gone.

However, there is an upside!  We recently rode through an area that was pungent with the smell of a skunk;  while Debbie held her hands over her face, I was undisturbed.

Anyway, I recently decided to do some research about this condition (called Anosmia = no nose  :-)) to see if there was anything I could do to reverse its effects.

Imagine my surprise when the first article I read was titled:  "Is loss of smell a 'harbinger of death'?"  The lead-line for this article on http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/283297.php states:  "A new study has suggested that, for older adults, being unable to identify smells could indicate mortality within five years."

The relatively brief article exposes two human research projects done in 2005-2006, and 2010-2011.  In these projects, the adults (age 57-85) were tested for their capacity to smell.  Before five years were up, 39% of those with significant smelling impairment had died as opposed to only 19% of those who could smell.

Hmmm...

So, I may have less than four years to live.  Sorry to have to share this news with you, Jeannette and Beverly!  [By the way, they've both lived way beyond the five year projection.]

Anyway, in case I knock off in the next several years, I just wanted to address a few things here for my friends and family.

I've lived a good life and have been blessed far more than I deserve. 

• By God's grace, I was raised by great parents who launched me into life with great expectations. 
• I received an excellent education at New Brighton High School, Roberts Wesleyan College, Asbury Theological Seminary, Pittsburgh Theological Seminary, and Franciscan University of Steubenville! 
• I married up! 
• Debbie and I had three awesome kids (Travis, Troy and Tracie) who have brought us untold joy!
• We enjoy our occasional contact with our precious grandchildren:  Rylie and Coltin.
• We've lived in many interesting places - having moved somewhere near twenty times (poor Debbie).
• We've made countless friends from the many places we've lived.
• I've enjoyed the respect of parishoners and peers after forty years in the ministry.
• We've lived and taught in China for three years!
• We've eaten at great restaurants and seen amazing things far and wide.
• I've been for a ride in some fancy, fast cars.
• I've climbed some tall mountains and hiked in majestic woods.

Do you understand that this list could go on-and-on?  When I say that I've lived a good life - I MEAN IT!!!!

Besides, I'm really relying on a promise that Jesus made when He was speaking to His disciples in John 8:51-52.  Here, Jesus made a special point of saying that those who rely on him and have received the kind of life that flows in him and in God will never experience death.  Later, in John 11:26, He simply says:  "...everyone living and believing in me shall never die".

How have we missed this?

At some point in the future (perhaps within four years) you will hear that I've died. 

WRONG!

Jesus says, "Very truly I tell you, whoever obeys my word will never see death.”  Don't believe it for a minute!  I may no longer be visible to you, but I will NOT BE DEAD!  Jesus said so!  I believe Him! 

I will be very much alive!  More alive than I ever was on this earth!  I will be enjoying the indescribable joys of Heaven!  Don't wish me back - I wouldn't come if I could!

Do I want to die?  No!  I'm enjoying this life and hope I live for many years to come (like my sisters).  There are still many unfulfilled dreams.  There's the day-to-day joy of living life with Debbie!  There are trails to hike and countries to visit.  I want to play - a lot - with my grandchildren and be there for their special moments.  I want to support my kids.  I want to work for my Lord! 

Am I afraid to leave this world?  Absolutely not! 

So, with my smeller intact or not, I'm moving forward with confidence.  I just wanted to set the record straight:  Thanks to the blessed assurance of my Lord, I WILL NEVER DIE!!!!!  Woo Hoo!!!! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!!

Mr. Rogers

I just watched a great video of Mr. Rogers on my friend, Tracy Massey's Facebook page.  It reminded me of a story.  :-)

When Travis was young, he LOVED Mr. Roger's Neighborhood and watched it every day.

My mother was still living then and she dearly loved Travis - even though she struggled to pronounce his name properly.  She so wanted to connect with him that she started watching Mr. Rogers every day too, so that she could talk with Travis about things on the show when he came to visit.

In time, she developed heart problems and had to have open-heart surgery for a valve replacement.  In 1980, this was a critical, new procedure that required a long, step-down process of recovery in the hospital.

One day while she was in a regular, two-patient room, my Dad was there to spend the day with her.  As they sat talking, she could see into the hall and noticed Mr. Rogers walking by her room.

For those who don't know, Fred Rogers was an ordained Presbyterian minister who often visited in the Pittsburgh hospitals.

Mom quickly told my dad to run him down and ask him if he would visit her! My dad obediently ran down the hall in pursuit of this famous man.  He readily returned to mom's room and spent twenty minutes with her - even praying with her!

Before he left, she told him, "Mr. Rogers, I watch your show every day! Would you give me an autograph for my grandson, Travis?"  He signed her lunch menu before he left.  I wonder what ever happened to that?