Search This Blog

Sunday, June 18, 2017

Dad Reflections

When I was growing up, I knew I had a good Dad because my Mom repeatedly told me:  "You have a good Dad!"  :-)   She didn't have to tell me - I knew he was a good man.  He was kind of quiet, but he had earned the respect of lots of people over the years.

He was the lay delegate to the Pittsburgh Annual Conference for decades. He was the secretary of the New Brighton Official Board and the Rochester District Conference equally as long (in those days the minutes were hand-written).  He served the Pittsburgh Conference in many capacities, foremost being a member of the Stationing Committee for over twenty-five years (now known as the Ministerial Appointments Committee).  He was a Class Leader for many years.  He was a trustee of the local church and of the Tri State Campground.  He was honored to be elected as a lay delegate to the Free Methodist General Conference five times!

Not a bad legacy for a man who dropped out of school after the eighth grade! At that time he concealed his real age in order to be hired at the Townsend Company where he ran nail-making machines for thirty years.  When they shut down the nail mill they sent him to night school to prepare him for running the new rivet machines.  He struggled with learning decimals and fractions;  I was in high school at the time and was able to help him with his homework!  :-)  After running rivet machines for about eight years, he moved to the tool-crib where he finished out his forty-eight years with the company!

He was not an affectionate man [see blog article "I Taught My Dad to Hug" written in June, 2012]. He worked a lot of overtime and then served as an evening maintenance man at the local children's home.  When he came home, my mother always had supper ready.  After the meal, he would retire to his bedroom to listen to WBVP on his stereo radio and read the evening paper.  He would only occasionally join Mom and me in watching television. He loved Gunsmoke and Paladin and also like Red Skelton (which surprised me).

I remember some Sunday afternoons when he would throw the baseball with me in the front yard. My mother - being a strict Sabbatarian - wasn't too thrilled when that happened!  By the time I was a teen, he had earned six weeks of vacation per year!  He took us camping near Salamanca, New York for two weeks every summer!  Those were fun times when I got to know him better.  He would swim with me and play games as well!

He loved my Mom and honored her in everything.  He was an excellent money-manager.  When I was four they sold their house on Mt. Washington (in Beaver Falls) and bought a brand new home in New Brighton.  I can barely remember their excitement at this move.

When our kids came along, he paid a lot of attention to them and loved them!  Fortunately, Troy and Tracie each have a few memories of Grandpap Haire!  They LOVED going to visit my folks because they had many bowls of candy in the living room!

After being extremely healthy for nearly 78 years, he struggled with physical problems for his last year-and-a-half.  He died in Mercy Hospital on the last Sunday of Family Camp in 1992.  I miss him dearly and often think of what a blessing he would be if he was still around.

Now, I'm 65 and retired.  Our children are grown and no longer dependent on us.  We delight in opportunities to spend time with them and LOVE their company!  Just this morning, I sat in worship with Troy;  then he took me to Five Guys for lunch.  We stopped to visit an old friend of mine on the way home and then he showed me a house that he's interested in.  The card he gave me stated:  "I'm blessed today...for the way you raised me, the values you instilled in your kids, your commitment to Mom, and now for your friendship..."  I'm humbled and honored!

I love being a Dad (and now a 'Poppy').  I'm SO PROUD of my kids!

Tracibeth (my personal name for her since she was born) is a truly amazing woman!  She is a great Mom and a dedicated wife!  She has been greatly appreciated over the years in the several jobs she has held (J. C. Penney's and Home Depot).  She led a support system for Navy wives during periods of Jon's deployment and mentored other wives through the reality of absent husbands for seven-month seasons.  She has co-led small groups in their church along with Jon!  She organized a Haire-family trip to Disney last October that none of us will ever forget!  She has phenomenal gifts for organization and leadership (although she doesn't fully recognize the latter yet).  When she was little, I told her that she could be anything she wanted to be.  At that time, I thought she might choose to be a lawyer, but she chose a higher path!  Everything she does makes me proud and it is impossible to express my love for her in a blog article!!!

Troy is (as stated above) one of my newest friends!  Building a garage together since last September has been an amazing way to get to know him better!  He is patient and determined to an extent that I had not fully realized before.  He has strong perfectionistic tendencies that he didn't get from me!  He is strong and capable with a consuming desire to learn new skills and gain new knowledge!  From what I can see, he is an excellent husband and cares passionately for Missy!  He loves her and prioritizes time with her on their shared days off!  I hope someday he has the opportunity to be a Dad;  I'm confident that he'd be a great one!  He surprises me with his sensitivity and his creativity. He takes his work (as a fire-fighter) very seriously and has stayed in excellent physical shape because of the importance of his work!  The word 'proud' doesn't even get close to describing my feelings about him!

Travis will always be dearly missed!  I've written about him many times before and will minimize my thoughts here.  He accomplished so much that continues to dazzle me!  I believe he was capable of doing just about anything!  I miss his input as Debbie and I make major decisions in our lives.  He was wise, impulsive, committed, mischievous, fun-loving, intelligent, determined (bull-headed), and universally respected!  He loved deeply and broadly and his circle of friendships covered all the bases [see "He Was My Friend" blog article from October, 2015].  Never a day passes without thinking of him and missing him.  He brought Josh into our lives - for which we are so grateful!  Josh's recent trip east for my retirement party gave us extended time to reminisce and share deeply together!  "Travis, I love you, son, and always will!"  His name for me was 'Pops', and I so miss hearing it from him!

So, you see, I am a blessed son and Dad!  God has been SO GOOD to me and I certainly didn't earn it and don't deserve it.
"How can I say thinks for the things You have done for me?  
Things so undeserved, yet You gave to prove Your love for me.  
The voices of a million angels could not express my gratitude.  
All that I am and ever hope to be, I owe it all to Thee.  
To God be the glory!" 
[words by Andre Crouch].  

Saturday, June 10, 2017

Buying Sneakers

I remember my Mom taking me to Pic-Way to buy my tennis shoes.  I was embarrassed about that, but, at least I occasionally got new ones!  When I became a teenager, I begged her to buy me a pair of Converse tennis shoes; she conceded and took me to Northern Lights and bought me a pair for $15. I remember how upset she was to pay such a price!

She infected my thinking!  Ever since, I hate to pay a lot of money for a pair of shoes!  I squawk and complain when Deb tries to talk me into spending $50 (or more) for a pair of shoes!  In my head, I know that shoe prices have gone up considerably since 1967, however, part of me still thinks that paying over $15 is criminal!

I've been stating recently that I need a new pair of sneakers for summer. So, today Deb took me to Gabe's to buy me a pair for Father's Day!

As usual, she quickly became distracted at the entrance along with hordes of other women who were sitting on the ground sorting through boxes of jewelry (most of which was a tangled mess). Meanwhile, I cruised through the store and picked out several items that I found interesting.

Then I got to the shoe section well ahead of her.  I quickly perused the stacks of size 11 shoes and found a pair to my liking.  Just as I was removing them - Deb arrived.  Here are the shoes I selected:
Cost - $35

Deb seemed to feel the need to give me other options.  So, soon I was trying on pair after pair of sneakers of a variety of brands, styles and colors!  

She liked this pair:
Cost - $50

Which, of course, is out of the question since I had already found a pair I liked for $35.  But, she's persistent and the shoes kept coming at me!  

"How about this pair?"
Cost - $55

Need I say more?  However, I must admit that they would go nice with my new daily uniform of blue jeans and T-shirt!  

"Do you like these?"
Cost - $50

They were too soft;  almost like they were made of foam rubber!  Besides, they're RED!  Are you kidding me?

"These are nice!  They're a lot like the ones you're wearing now..."  [Tactical move!]
Cost - $45

"They're OK, but what about the ones I picked out before you got here?  Don't you like them?  They're only $35!"

She didn't seem to hear me.

Suddenly, I remembered the advice our family doctor had given my Dad MANY years ago:  
"Leonard,
Never skimp when it comes to two things:
your shoes and your bed!
You spend all day in your shoes and all night in your bed.
Spend the money on these items as an investment in your health!"

Should I follow Dr. Chadwick's advice?  Should I shuck out the extra for these sneakers?  I was feeling the pressure!

"Here's a nice pair;  they're young-looking!"  [Big smile!  -  The heat is on now!]   
By the way, I'm 65!!!!!

I was beginning to feel the need to compromise!  Besides, I was on the verge of a panic attack and really needed to escape the shoe department!  By the way, did you know that green is my favorite color?  Yep, just like God, I LOVE the color green!

But, there was still time on the clock!  "I really like these, plus, you've never had blue sneakers before!  And, they're only $40."

That was it!  I caved!  Sorry guys...

So, these went back on the shelf...

...and these went home with me!

But I don't think I'm allowed to wear them until Father's Day.

I hope they wear well because I need some time to recuperate before going through this process again!  Whew!

Sunday, June 4, 2017

Here Are The Reasons

I attended the annual sessions of the Pittsburgh Conference on Friday and Saturday.  While there, we captured the following picture including the four most recent pastors of the Kittanning Free Methodist Church.
Hal, Wayne Sawyer, Forrest States, and Mel McRoberts

At the conclusion of the conference, Bishop Roller read Forrest States' name out as the new pastor of the Kittanning Church.  That made it official:  I'm retired!

An old friend came up to me during the conference with a very blunt question:  "Hal, why are you retiring?"

Being 65 had almost nothing to do with my decision;  actually, I had expected to lead a church well beyond this age.  However, there are several answers to his question.

Foremost is that I recognized I'm not leading with the same passion, enthusiasm and creativity that has characterized most of my ministry years. I vowed to myself many years ago that I would step out when I realized that was happening.

A second reason is my hearing deficiency!  In spite of buying some very expensive hearing aids, I still struggle in most settings.  I'm thankful I can still hear, but the loss is far more of a problem than most people realize!

Another reason:  I didn't like being a 'commuting pastor'.  The 62-mile trip took 75 minutes to drive. I found myself increasingly fighting sleep while driving.  Because of the trip's expense, I slept on the floor in my office two nights a week - that got old fast!  ;-)   Being away from Debbie three days a week was challenging.

There are other reasons, but I'll omit them here.  Suffice it to say that I'm excited about our future. Debbie and I have been given the blessings of good health and a strong marriage.  There are things we look forward to pursuing individually and as a couple.

Only yesterday we had lunch with Dale W____, Free Methodist Missions Director for the Middle East.  We crossed paths with him a number of times while we were in China.  He opened doors for us to consider in his area! Exciting possibilities!  :-)

But today, I'm very grateful for the family and friends who wish us well on our new journey!  The Kittanning FMC congregation was very gracious in parting with us.  I'm very excited for them as they welcome Pastor Forrest (and Elsie) States this morning!  I believe their future will be bright and fruitful!

Last weekend, Debbie hosted a very enjoyable retirement party for me (with a lot of help from our kids and her family)!  I was honored!  I've received lovely cards and gifts!

I've said it many times and I'll say it again:  When the Bible talks about the prosperous man - it's talking about me!

Kind and Gracious God,

Thank You for helping me through these many years of schooling and ministry!  

Thank You for my family and their love and care!

Thank You for the abundance of friends You've blessed me with through the years!

Thank You for the kindness and cooperation of my congregations!  I have many memories of exciting times of ministry to ponder during these retirement years!  

And thank You for the hope of a renewed purpose and direction for the years that remain!  

May I always be Your faithful servant...

Amen.